YouTube link added 02.10.09
9:31 PM, Thursday, November 13th 2003:
All day. All day I have thought about this, knowing I have to write SOMETHING, but having no idea how to. So I'll basically just take you through the night, and tell you exactly what happened.
So last night we have the storm of the century in LA. A downpour that I hadn't seen since the night of the Comedy Store in 2001 (so not really the storm of the century huh? LOL):
"Now, the only thing that could ruin this night at this point would be a blizzard. Something that would keep our people from coming out. Well in LA, they call blizzards "rain". And holy SHIT did it start raining. This is not good. Simply put, people will not come out. I laughed at Murphy for a moment, and simply concentrated on getting there in one piece."
It then hit me that it was November 12th...exactly 2 years after to the day. How poetic huh? Well this rainstorm was a little more crazy. Snow in Watts crazy. Now it's technically hail, but tell that to all the black kids running around in the snow today making angels and having snowball fights. It had to be the cutest thing I've ever seen. These kids had NEVER seen snow before - they were havin' a ball.
ANYWAY, I had to rush like a madman after work to get things set-up as the guy who usually runs the lights at this theater informed me yesterday that he wasn't gonna be there. In fact, no one would - he gave me the keys to the place and said good luck. (sigh). So I set up the old light rig I had back in the 90s and thought "well this will certainly be a one-man show won't it" There's so many on and off cues, especially in part 2... oh well.
So I get there and the infamous "publicist" couple gets their early. They had asked if they could help out since Jess wasn't gonna be around taking the door for me. If you don't remember, these are the people that gave me the idea to get a publicist back in Entry #280. They were actually the people sitting waiting for me to start during my LA premiere. Here I'll zoom in on 'em for you. LOL. Very sincere people - a true rarity in this city.
So anyway, about 11 showed up. The show went beautifully. Unfortunately there was one older couple there that I knew wasn't gonna enjoy it. The lady is a patient from work who has just been so supportive and excited through all my physical transformations - and I've tried to politely warn her, but she really wanted to come. She actually said nice things afterwards, but the guy she came with skipped out pretty quick. It doesn't really phase me like it used I know the talent comes through no matter what the characters are saying...but I always think of my grandmother. I'll have less raunchy material soon enough. Bottom line - the show is exactly what it should be for a guy my age. The characters are all early twenties - a rather raunchy time anyway.
So afterwards the Bowyer's took me out to dinner. They had asked earlier in the week if I'd be free after and I said yes. I'm so freakin' humbled by that you know? I want to say "Oh you really don't have to do that..." but you can only do that so much before it's just rude. So I was as thankful and grateful as I could possibly be. Oddly enough we went to Dalt's, an old Columbus hang-out that I didn't even know was here, and we of course talked more about the publicist.
In all my 4 years of keeping this detailed journal, I have never forgotten such an important piece, but I was so dumbfounded at the moment I forget what she said to me. It was something along the lines of them wanting to invest in me. To make sure I got this publicist, and that money didn't stop the "roll" that I'm on right now. To which I replied in almost a rude manner:
I don't know if they thought I was offended, or angry - but honest-to-GOD I nearly peed myself. In my mind I'm thinking "You're gonna buy me food, and give me money? Are you high?". I finally said: "Uhm, Ok, so what's the agreement here? How's this gonna work". And she said it in no uncertain terms:
"You agree to succeed."
They then went on to explain how long they had been out here, both pursuing their acting careers, and other various enterprises in showbiz and the bottom line was, they simply believe that much in me. They've seen the show, they've gotten to know me, they obviously sense my sincerity and they just want to see someone really make it. It's very much a "Pay it Forward" scenerio. I mentioned that the initial fee is really just the tip of the iceberg and they just said:  "Will cross that bridge when we get there...for now - just get there".
Everything I could possibly type at this moment is cliched beyond words. I am so humbled, so honored, so shocked, so everything...that anyone would believe in me that much. Granted, they have talked to me at work for the better part of the year, and it's amazing how much can come across in say a dozen 2 minute conversations...but this is just unbelieveable. It's these types of generosity that just fill me with... with power. From the listener that sent Jess and I $500 back in 2000 (and has since bought 5 copies of everything I've ever done just to give to friends) to hell, even Charlotte who, although it soured, put her money, heart and soul into me believing I had what it takes. Granted it would all be coming back to her, but it was still the same type of recognition that just blows me away.
But all day I've been in this sort of...well funk really. I know I should be bouncing off the walls, but I feel very heavy for some reason. I feel a responsibilty now that is much deeper. It's the same responsibility I feel to every person who ever listened to "The Late Show" or who ever bought any of my CDs or DVDs and truly gave me their support. I have to do this for them. And now there's an even greater example of people that really just want someone they know and like - pull it off. So all I can do now is push it as strong as I ever have. And it goes without saying that these are the people that you help out when you get to that point in your career that you can. These are the sincerely great people you have to be lucky enough to run into in this city to make it. I can't tell you how rare that is. Michele Greene is one of those people as well. Someone you know is just trying to be a friend and give any advice where it's possible. I feel like the luckiest guy on the planet right now...
...and tomorrow we shoot my scenes for her pilot. It's a tide people. It's this absolute wave of positivity that is leading me right back to where I was before. I send out the money order, DVDs, letter and headshots to the publicist tomorrow (or Saturday depending on how long it takes for me to get this letter perfect) - and chances are I'll know if they accept me by the end of the year. I know I overanalyze way too damn much but you'd be crazy to ignore the signs here. It is still a longshot that a company this big takes me on as a client...but it's a longshot I'm feeelin' baby. I mean could more things happen in one year or what?
I'll let you know how tomorrow goes...most likely won't have any video of anything - but maybe I can get them to run something off onto my digital 8 tape. I'll just have to play it by ear. Man it's gonna be a blast. Wish Jess was freakin' HERE for all this! AHHH.
Two more days.