- Entry
#83
-
 -
- Dad: "No, no, no.
If I hear that sunuva bitch tell me what his
name
is one more
time, it's over."
-
- Love
it.
-
- We got
an advanced copy of Eminem's single "My
Name Is" and I LOVED it. Not sure
why they gave it to an alternative rock
station - but Jack spotlighted it on his
show as something new and
crazy.
-
- I
thought it was one of the most original
things I'd ever heard and Eminem's voice
and style just knocked me out. It's one of
the only times I heard something that
early and said unequivocally: "This guy is
gonna be the biggest thing in the world".
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-
- Isn't really a
full Boyles Episode as much as it's just an extended
song. I remember Jodi (the morning gal) just couldn't
understand why I didn't just do a straight song
parody and for FM she did have a point. But hey, I
have a soft spot for The Boyles and love theater of
the mind. It's a great piece. And it's time for you to
lay down MAD props for me writing all this out.
It's quite a bit...
-
- G-LESTER
- PARODY OF EMINEM'S
"MY NAME IS
(SLIM SHADY)"
-
- Dad: "Ahh,
finally some peace and quiet. Isn't that nice
Mare?"
- Mom: "Yes,
yes it is Robert"
-
- (LOUD MUSIC
COMING FROM JOHNNY'S ROOM)
-
- Dad: "Oh my
GOD what is that? Is that? I think it's coming
- from
Johnny's room"
- Mom: "Yeah
it is"
- Dad: "Good
GOD!"
- Mom: "Make
him turn it down!"
- Dad: "What
the hell?"
-
- IN JOHNNY'S ROOM
- (LISTENING TO EMINEM,
TRYING TO RAP ALONG)
-
- Eminem: "My
brain's dead weight, I'm trying to get my head
straight, But I can't figure out what Spice Girl
I wanna impregnate. Dr. Dre said: 'Slim Shady,
you're a base head','uh uh' 'then why's your face
red?' 'I'm just wasted' 'well since age 12, I felt
like a caged elf, who stayed to
himself..."
-
- ROBERT KNOCKS ON JOHNNY'S DOOR
-
- Johnny:
"Wha, Nothin' Dad! Nothin'!"
- Dad: "Open
the door!"
- Johnny:
"Shoot! Uhm, uhm, how's it goin'
dad?"
- Dad: "Uhm,
how's it goin'? That's a little loud don't you
think?"
- Johnny: "How
can I become a rapper, if I can't just be
in the environment, ya know?"
- Dad: "A
rapper?"
- Johnny:
"Yeah!"
- Dad: "Oh,
I see...uh"
- Johnny:
"Yeahl, 'cause that's what I've always wanted to
be. I'll be just like all...like uh, Snoop Dog, and
Ice Cube, and Eminem!"
- Dad: "You're
white, and you live in West Virgina
Johnny..."
- Johnny:
"Yeah but Eminem is white, and he's got Slim Shady!
You can't get any bigger than Slim
Shady!"
- Dad: "Johnny
just use your headphones, OK?"
- Johnny:
"But!"
- Dad: "It's
way too loud"
- Johnny: "But
how can I feel like I'm in the environment of
a real rapper if I'm wearing
headphones?"
- Dad:
"Johnny! Put your headphones on! That's
enough."
- Johnny:
"(mocking Robert) Put your headphones on, that's
enough...I'll show him, someday..."
-
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-Johnny
Boyle,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-Johnny
Boyle,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-Johnny
Boyle,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-Johnny
Boyle,
-
- Hi kids, do
you like rappers?
(yeah)
- I like
rappers, because I am a rapper
(yeah),
- Do you like
parents?
(no,
no) I
don't like parents,
- Because they
don't want you to be a rapper,
(heh
heh)
-
- That song
says don't make your baby be cowboys
(yee-ha),
- But it
doesn't say anything about rappers
(no),
- So what the
hell's up my dad's ass,
- I just
wanna
(his
finger)
get jiggy with it (get jiggy with it),
-
- We're gonna
ride tonight
(yeah),
- Yeah come
on, we're gonna ride tonight,
- It's time to
get this mutha-fucka-statrted
(started),
- In this
mutha-fuckin' house - YEEAH
(come
on come
on),
-
- That's what
I'm talkin' 'bout BITCH, yeah come on come
on,
- Put your
hands in the air there
(they're
up
there),
put your hands in the air,
- Like you
just don't mu-fuckin' care
(no i
don't
care).
- I'm about to
get busy in this mu-fucka
(get
busy johnny)
-
- 'Cause my
name's Johnny Boyle...
-
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-Johnny
Boyle,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-Johnny
Boyle,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-Johnny
Boyle,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-Johnny
Boyle,
-
- You know
how, the other black rappers, they're like:
- 'Hey, this
is J.T., featuring Puffy-Daddy
(and
Mase),
and the beat-boy
- Slim
remix'
(yeah),
Well I'm about to get jiggy with it there
too,
- And I'll
introduce you to the oldest homeschool rapper ever
was
(oh
yeah),
- Give it up
for my homey G-Lester
(G-Lester)
Boyee,
-
- I'm gonna
Bap, gonna boop, gonna beep ya,
- Gonna beep
gonna bap, gonna boop ya,
- Skibby dank,
skibby donk, skibby do,
- Skibbidy-dop,
skibiddy wop, wop, wop, woop,
- We're gonna
ride tonight, skibbidy domp, bomp, bomp,
bomp,
- We're gonna
ride tonight, skibbidy domp, dup, dup,
do,
- My homey
there, but G-Lester's in the house,
- Skibbidy
dank, skibbidy donk, skibbidy dop, bop,
bow!
-
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-G-Lester,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-G-Lester,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-G-Lester,
- Hi! My
name is
(what?),
My name is
(who?)
My name is,
- Jiggy-jiggy-G-Lester,
-
- G-Lester:
"Damn! I'm the bomb,"
- Johnny:
"Yeah you are!"
- G-Lester: "I
am the mack-daddy"
- Johnny:
"Let's rap together!"
- G-Lester:
"Ooh yeah, that'd be spooky in this house,
Go!"
-
- I'm here with
my old school boy,
- G-Lester,
jump for noise,
- Put your
hands in the air like you just don't
care,
- Me and
G-Lester gonna break it
down,
-
- We got
Johnny-B here, G-Lester over
there,
- He's scattin'
dawg, ain't nothin' to
fear,
- Listen to the
Dawg go,
- Aww
yeah,
- Bring it
on,
-
- I'm about to
get alphabetical in this mu-fu**a
yeah,
-
- A-B-C-D-E-F-G,
- H-I-J,
- K-L-M,
- N-O-P,
- Q-R-S-T-U-V-W-X-Y-Z,
|
- Dip, Dip
Doop, skibby-dobby-doop,
- Skibby-dibby-deep,
skibidylop-op-boop,
- Oh!
Skibbidy-bomp, skibbidy-geek,
skibbidy-go,
- Skibbidy-dop,
skibbidy-dop, skibbidy-no,
-
- Skibbidy,
blop blop, ba blope blope, ba
bleep,
- Ba blop blop
ba bloop, biggidy bop, biggidy
beep,
- Skibbidy
bank, skibbidy gonk, skibbidy
do
- Wiggeda,
wiggeda whack,
- A-wiggeda-wiggeda-you-a!
-
- Bop-boo-beep,
eh dap dap.,
-
- Scop-do-beep!
Bam chicka-bomp,
- Chicka-beep,
- Chicka-do,
- My name's
- G-Lester, who
are you!?
|
- Hi!
Our names our
(what?),
our names are
(who?),
our names are,
- Jiggy,
jiggy G and Johnny,
- Hi!
Our names our
(what?),
our names are
(who?),
our names are,
- Jiggy,
jiggy G and Johnny,
- Hi!
Our names our
(what?),
our names are
(who?),
our names are,
- Jiggy,
jiggy G and Johnny,
- Hi!
Our names our
(what?),
our names are
(who?),
our names are,
- Jiggy,
jiggy G and Johnny,
-
- G-Lester: "Well
Johnny, I always knew you'd follow in my footsteps and
become a great rapper,"
- Johnny: "Yeah,
my dad said I couldn't do it because I'm white and
from West Virginia, I guess I showed
him,"
-
- (RECORD SCRATCH)
-
- DAD: "Johnny
turn that shi* off!"
- Johnny:
"But..."
- Dad:
"Now!"
- Johnny: "I,
I was"
- Dad: "No,
no, no. If I hear that sunuva bitch tell me
what his name
is
one more time, it's over."
- Johnny: "But
what about G-Lester dad?"
- Dad:
"G-what?"
- Johnny: "Me
and G-Lester, skibbidy-dop,
skibbidy-do."
- Dad:
"Go...to...bed"
-
- (WALKS OUT
AND SLAMS DOOR)
-
- Johnny:
"Yeah well you just wait! Someday
Dad!
-
- (MUSIC COMES UP)
-
- Johnny: "My
name is, (yeah) my name is, my name is, my name
is...Johnny Boyle..."
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