ENTRY #156
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9:01 AM, Tuesday, December 4th, 2001:
Ah, shit. Woke up this morning at 7 AM after 5 hours of rolling around. I just hate to say I'm depressed. I hate to admit it really. There honestly is nothing "negative" about my show not fitting into a "theme" that Aspen is having this year. But...
I want more. I want to be THE best. I want to be so good - the theme could be "dead puppies" and I would win. I'm in the top 10? Well then I am FIRST and you figure out the other 4 'cause it ain't gonna matter I'm best. That's my attitude plain and simple. Blaming the "theme" is what a loser who doesn't make it says. It's the guy who goes onstage - and SUCKS, and blames the audience. On the other hand...
No it isn't. The theme DOES matter - and my originality and inventiveness has bit me in the ass here.
Charlotte came over last night to pick up some tapes for her day of harrassment today. She said she was absolutely shell-shocked at the call. Completely thought Alyssa would say: "Of course you're in..." Says she cannot believe they would want 5 of the SAME OLD SHIT when they have an opportunity to have something so inventive and new, no matter what the theme is. I told her that I thought George Carlin was probably the "honoree" this year, and she agreed. Every year at Aspen they have an honoree, last year was Robin Williams. I figured with this new more serious "free speech" theme - Carlin is the perfect candidate. He also has a new one man show - so there ya go... As I said before the majority of one-man shows fall into this category with ease, so I see no reason why they would put me in. I mean think of it this way: Imagine my act opening for George Carlin. That just AIN'T gonna happen. Not that that's how it works at Aspen, but again - with the theme...I'm just screwed.
We also talked about how we can't even think of 5 other one-man shows that would fit into the category either. And here's the killer - if we don't make it, Charlotte is so angry she's going to every show that made it for no other reason but to be angry. LOL. She wants to know exactly what they chose over us - for some unknown reason. She's got fire...that's good. On an actual "productive" note our plan of action if Aspen is gone is to get every single person who would've seen me there to come to my shows BEFORE the festival. Not going to Aspen actually moves the "development deal" along a little quicker. If we get in, we almost lay low a bit - maybe a show a month until Aspen. Without Aspen, it's kill or be killed.
Man, and right now I am killed. Highs and lows baby. November was easily the best month of my life man. Fuck balance. LOL.
What the hell is this entry? Ramblng, rambling, rambling. I told myself I would get up this morning and try to put it behind me and start working on the script. RIGHT. I woke up at 7:04 AM and thought: "I'm not going to Aspen" - and that was it. This is gonna have to gnaw at me for a few more days I'm afraid. You can't set yourself up for 10 straight months and be able to forget it in a day.
Can I at least take solace that I made it to the top ten? That I'm "in the running"?....no. As I said in the second paragraph: The best, the best, the best. I don't care if they got 1000 submissions, I will always want to be #1 and be pissed if I'm #2...let alone #6. That's just sickening. That they could feasibly pick 5 people ahead of me. DAHHHHHHH. I'm gonna leave the keyboard for awhile. See what happens today. I'll be back.
3:51 PM
DAMN! What a difference a few hours makes. So Charlotte gets a hold of Grace Wu. That is the VP of Comedy Development at NBC Network TV. For reference, Rose Catherine Pinkney is the VP of Comedy Development at Paramount Network TV. That is who got my tape from Helen, whom I had the meeting with at Paramount last week. Jesus what a puzzle this all is. Anyway - Grace has seen the tape...loved it. Bringing development people to the next show (which is now either the 17th ot 18th of December at Largo. She is on the 12 person Advisory Board that is meeting tomorrow. She completely feels that my show should be a part of Aspen no matter what the theme. She said she will push for the others to at LEAST see a callback live, and if they aren't going to - to include me in the category. During the conversation Charlotte got quite an inspiration. Bear with me, as this seems like quite a bit of bullshit when you first hear it:
The Trinitrons is very much about free speech. The other TVs don't have it, and to make them look STUPID, Adam gives it to them (allowing them to change their clothes and do their own sets) but it backfires on him. Leading to Cameron's final speech which can easily be changed to incorporate the theme. A tiny bit of a stretch - but it could also be quite tongue-in-cheek. All which relates to the Aspen Festival
Now the big problem is is letting these people know this in a matter of hours. Man I thought last weekend was stressful - this is absolutely NUTS. This really, really gives me hope. On top of all that, guess who I have a meeting with next month? Grace Wu. Before it was just: I'm bringing some development people to the next show, now it's a general meeting. Hot damn. As well Charlotte said she was extremely familiar with her, and felt very much on our side. She said we need to get another person on the board for her to team up with if there's any shot of true influence with a dozen people spouting opinions. What I wouldn't give to be a fly on that wall. What an intense meeting that will be.
Anyway, Charlotte is busy as we speak getting ahold of Anne Maney. She came to the Comedy Store show and gave the good word to Alyssa. The word which was supposed to garner a callback, but now has turned into all this. Man, life is moving a mile a minute. This is such a soap opera.
12:30 AM
Alright, well not much has changed. Left a message for Anne, got 5 tapes to 5 people and was able to talk to the assistants of all 5. She is guessing that some of these people are part of the advisory board. She THINKS she knows but is unsure. Even if they don't watch the ten minute tape - it'll pique their interest. Now when Grace goes to bat, they'll have a little background to it. If Anne comes in for the kill...this just, may, happen.
Damnit - now my hopes are all up again. I'm just askin' to be SLAMMED ain't I. And of course for the video. It could be part 1 of 2...if I get in. Otherwise it just sucks. But you have to admit, the drama is absolutely incredible. So I'll put it all on the line and grasp at one last hope of a great ending. Here's Commudus (Aspen) suprising Maximus (heh, me...) with the dagger (the Aspen "theme"). So how will it end?
Next Entry.
original video file