ENTRY #155
YouTube and Feedback links added 02.12.09
6:39 PM, Monday, December 3rd, 2001:
It's feasible that this is just a way to add drama to "The Journey". The proverbial knife in Maximus's side by Commudus right before the battle where he kills him anyway.
Unfortunately, I'm pretty logical - and the knife just may kill me.
The judges watched the tape. They enjoyed it. Found it impressive. Saw that it was quite the crowd pleaser. But this year at the Aspen Comedy Festival there is a more serious theme. The theme of "free speech" is apparently a basis for their judgement. Now obviously most one man shows EASILY fall into this category. It's one guy talkin' about his life or his views and being witty and so on...etc. My show however is very, very different. It completely stands out. It does not, in any stretch of the imagination, fall into a "cerebral, free speech" category.
There will be no callbacks, they are judging the 5 one man shows by tape as they don't have time to set everything up. They have narrowed it down to 10, and I am one of those 10. The whole world down to 10 tapes, with 1/2 making it, and 1/2 not. It would seem those are good chances with as great as the show is, but with this "theme" - I'm fucked folks. No chance in my mind. Why? Because they can soooooo easily find 5 that go with their more serious theme. By the nature of one-man shows it all but eliminates me. As well, she mentioned that I'm completely unknown. These other acts have applied for Aspen year after year. I guess that plays a part as well.
There will be a big advisory board meeting on Wednesday and they'll make the final announcement for the one-man show category by the end of the week. Charlotte knows a few of the people on that board, and we are rushing to make tapes for them as we speak. If any of these people push for me, I could buck the "theme" and make it.
I take all of this news 2 ways. The first is absoulte and utter depression. LOL. Something I've thought about every day for nearly a year - is most likely not gonna happen. I have yet to allow that to sink in. But the other side to all this is that had we known of this theme before...it would've made no difference. I would still have made the exact same one-man show and gone the same route. I would've just realized a LOOOONG TIME ago, that Aspen this year wasn't gonna happen. Unfortunately, I've built it up soooo big that this is a SUPREME letdown. And it shouldn't be! There's nothing I could've changed! This one-man show is gonna get me a development deal either way, and that's what really matters. Aspen would've helped move that process along VERY nicely.
I just turned on my video camera. I had it sitting on top of my monitor for that last video and I just realized it's all sinking in, and thought I chould catch this. Me allowing this all to sink in. Ha! And I drank a shot of vodka! There. That's a good way to solve problems!!! LOL.
Well there really is no "problem" to solve. It's just the way it is. I got my hopes up for something that I couldn't fit into. And I'm PROUD AS HELL I can't fit into it. I don't want to be like everyone else - and if this year they're celebrity a theme that other "fit" into...I'm not a part of that.
Of course we will find out for sure most likely on Thursday, but I'd just as soon move on - start concentrating on the pilot again (As opposed to losing my FREAKIN' MIND) and get ready for the next show which should be very, very soon.
DAMN I wanted Aspen. What a shitty case of bad timing - ANY OTHER YEAR. And no, I have no idea what the themes were in years previous, but I assume that 9/11 had a lot to do with the more "serious" tone - and that alone makes this one stand out. Well, I'll try to be an optomist here. I'll make some copies for Charlotte to pimp and just see if I get lucky. Goddamn I wish we had had more shows leading up to this so we could've created more of a buzz. That just may have propelled me past this serious shit.
original video file