ENTRY #117
YouTube and Feedback links added 02.13.09
5:32 PM, Tuesday, April 3rd, 2001:
Simply incredible. I honestly thought I was a bit over my head here. April Fool's Day Jokes can never be TOO big, or they fall through - so winning the LOTTERY was gonna be tough. Somehow, only 2 or 3 of you caught it right away. I'm sure many others of you don't want to admit you were snookered...whereas the rest of you...MY LORD you were fooled. Some of you won't know it was a joke until NOW! LOL - I was so stunned by your reactions. This entry truly has some of the biggest laughs on the entire site. Before I get to 'em, I thought I'd explain some of the tricks:
I got this fortune about 2 months ago, and held on to it...
Every number on here is completely fabricated...
Indeed a real ticket, but again, the numbers are all fabricated...
These weren't even the results. You may ask why the hell I didn't use SOME real numbers...
I fabricated numbers that were on both the ticket and the results so I only had to use 4 different digits...
Believe it or not, even THESE numbers are fake. I had to add $100,000 to the 5 of 5 row.
Whereas $27,000,000 was too much to be believable, $12,000 just wasn't enough.
The other tricks of course were putting all your email addresses at the top of the entry. Had I said: "I won the lottery!" - you would've been wary. But by making you look for your name, I diverted you a bit. As well, I downplayed everything because I didn't actually win it all. And if I had truly been one number off on the MEGA number, I'd have to go shoot heroin or something. I don't know if I could deal with that.
The biggest thing though, that kept it going...was this whole "journey". If you've followed it all, you're kind of ROOTING for us. And you always want the "deserving" people to win the lottery.
Oh and the thought that you all were getting $100 as well certainly helped. LOL! With all that being said, I honestly didn't think it'd go over THIS well. I mean I assumed I'd get a few "ASSHOLE!" emails, but I never dreamed that so many of you would actually email me your address because you didn't read the last paragraph. HAHAHA.
Now please, take your time with these. If you're rushed right now, come back when you can REALLY read these and enjoy them. Some of them are FANTASTIC. Alright, the following are people who read it, were tricked, but READ THE WHOLE ENTRY and replied accordingly:
I was just about to send you an e-mail congratulating you and saying KEEP
your money, you need it more than I do....
BETTER send me something now, asshole!!! LOL!!
You'd think I'd have remembered last year, and today's magic date, but you
got me again, ass! I was about ready to chug a beer to your good fortune!
Hey Adam,
Good April Fools' prank. The faked ticket and fortune and everything was great! Would that it had been real... I don't give a shit about getting the $100 for myself, but for what it could have done for you and Jess... ah, well. Good prank anyway.
Hang in there, and best of luck in all your endeavors,
YOU SUCK!!!! You had 3 of my regular numbers on that April Fools joke! I thought I had won! But, good news, I did win $10 from Wed. drawing and I hadn't checked yet! So thanks for the heads up. I was sitting here looking at the winning numbers vs. your e-mail wondering how you thought you had won! I wouldn't have figured it out, but they just had an April Fool's joke on tv and it connected, I also wondered how I didn't hear you guys celebrating...good job!
I was half asleep, read your entry woke up, and then looked at the
calender....lol This is classic and excellent. You got me good last year
but at least I caught on this time before I made a fool of myself by sending
you my address.
You truly are a bastard, you know that? I just woke up, read your entry
and think, "Wow, good for them." I was even going to write and tell you to
keep my share, but forget it now, bucco! I want my $100 for putting up
with this crap!
**** Bushnell Road
Conneaut, OH. 44030
And I want that check in a week, or else I come out there and take it out
of Jessica's hide (you didn't expect me to fight you, did you?)!
This was a pretty good one, I believed it all the way until the end...except I was going to tell you to hang on to your money...
AAARRGGHHH! Ya got me again, brotha! I was about to write and say how
fucking cool that was and how happy I was for you guys! But you got me! At
least you told me before I finished putting on my shoes on my way to get
Chinese! haha!
It worries me what a good liar you are... ; )~
Nice joke...prick.
My reaction was "He finally caught a break..." as I read it... then I got to the last paragraph and it was... "That greasy little fucker..."
APHID143: hey, i accidentally deleted the email, so i went to the web site to check it out, and it wasn't there
Adam4tvs: ?
Adam4tvs: uhm
Adam4tvs: yeah it is
APHID143: just soderbergh
Adam4tvs: GO TO APRIL you GENIUS
Adam4tvs: ROFL
APHID143: shit is it april
APHID143: geez!!!!
APHID143: is my face red
Adam4tvs: lol
(...minutes later...)
APHID143: you ass!!!
APHID143: lol
Adam4tvs: ;-)
APHID143: damn't i even had you tell me it was april
Adam4tvs: no shit - i thought that would give it away
APHID143: if this was a cartoon, i would have a little ballon with a picture of a donkey above my head
Dude, you are amazing. I wish that I could hit the lottery. I wonder what Katy would think of my last name if I won a cool $20mil? Probably wouldn't matter then, would it?
Congratulations Adam!
It is my fondest hope for you that the 12 tickets that matched all 5 numbers each receive the $112,866 rather than having to split that number 12 ways. Either way, it will be nice to have that kind of payday! I look forward to hearing how the whole thing pans out!
It just occurred to me that it was April Fools day yesterday...
Well, today I have a sprained thigh muscle from YOU YANKING ON MY LEG!!
You bastard! I didn't get the email or read the post until today. I was
already OVER the April Fool's thing. I can't believe I fell for that. You
You are a jackass!!!
I started reading it then I scrolled back up to the top to check the date. I
figured you were up to something. If it was true I was personally going to
tell you to keep it. You are such a shit!
Then there were the guys who bought it, read the end, then thought the REAL April Fool's Day joke was that I HAD won...what a cool twist that would've been:
Hey, is the REAL joke that you DID win some money? And we are going to get something in the mail without any warning?
Snede7711: very cool
Adam4tvs: ;-)
Adam4tvs: you're on the list - right?
Snede7711: i am
Adam4tvs: sweet
Snede7711: save the money though for the Adam Kontras gas and electric bill fund
Adam4tvs: dude - if I win $150,000
Adam4tvs: i think $100 is gonna be pretty expendable
Adam4tvs: but first you gotta read the whole entry...
Snede7711: ok
(...minutes pass...)
Adam4tvs: ....
Adam4tvs: did you read the last paragraph?
Snede7711: regarding the April Fools joke?
Adam4tvs: yesssss....
Adam4tvs: ???!?!?
Snede7711: yes, I havent decided whether or not it is a joke
Adam4tvs: LOL
Adam4tvs: so I'm joking about the joke?
Adam4tvs: HAHAHAHA
And then of course the people who were absolutely suckered. So much so, they didn't even bother to read the END of the entry. I honest to GOD never dreamed this would happen. I'm truly floored by the following emails...but godamn they're funny:
Hey Adam,
That's fucking amazing.....everything happens for a reason, you know? I
hope that even if it is a little bit of money it's going to help you out.
We artists deserve all the breaks we can get, right? Take care- :)
HRVSmiley: congratulations
Adam4tvs: THANK YOU!
HRVSmiley: that is so cool so all your hard work has came back to you
Adam4tvs: are you on that list!!!???
HRVSmiley: ya
Adam4tvs: well cross your fingers!
HRVSmiley: but I'm not taking anything from you
Adam4tvs: you won't take $100 if I win $150,000?
Adam4tvs: come ON!
HRVSmiley: i just called cassi and she thought i was april fooling her
Adam4tvs: HAHAHA (i was truly laughing here)
HRVSmiley: so you dont know how much you won yet
Adam4tvs: won't know until Monday
Adam4tvs: it SUCKS
HRVSmiley: i bet the anticipation is tearing at you like hot knifes
Adam4tvs: haven't slept
HRVSmiley: o i would be the same way pacing the ground
Adam4tvs: you gotta read the end of the entry...
(...minutes later...)
HRVSmiley: you didn't
Adam4tvs: hee hee
HRVSmiley: ohhhhhhhh you basterd lol lol :-[
HRVSmiley: :-D
Adam4tvs: ROFL
HRVSmiley: i dont know caz i was so happy for you i wanted to call and tell you
Adam4tvs: ;-)
HRVSmiley: god i'm such a dork lol lol lol lol
HRVSmiley: i did not even relize it was 4-1 tell cassi said something and it still did not even regaster
Adam4tvs: that's the funny part
Adam4tvs: SHE TOLD YOU
Adam4tvs: HAHAHA
Good luck...
Brian ****
That is so sweet.... My wife won 15 bucks last week. I guess this is nothing
in comparison. Hey I love reading the updates to your journey into fame and
fortune. I wish I just would have had the balls to do it myself when I was younger, but hey Im happy with 3 kids and an awesome wife.
Well Thats cool if you want to send 100 Bucks my way but not necessary. I'll let you make the decision. Keep up the good work and I hope everything works out man.... Till next time Live it Up YOU WON!!!
Chad ****
**** Brandie Dr.
Delaware, OH 43015
740-362-**** Home
614-374-**** Cell
Bart14000: your right it does pay to read your updates
Adam4tvs: it does pay to actually READ them, as opposed to skimming them...
(peeing my pants)
Bart14000: i read this one, you were only one number off of winning the whole thing,
Adam4tvs: and...
Bart14000: you won 112,886,
Adam4tvs: and...
Bart14000: so after taxes its about 40k
Adam4tvs: LOL
Bart14000: see i did read it,
Bart14000: and now we the listeners wait till tomorrow to find out for sure the totals
(I was almost speechless at this point)
Adam4tvs: you ever take that test in school, where the last question says: "Don't do the first 19 questions"
Bart14000: no, i havent done that yet, sounds mean
Adam4tvs: you should always read through things before making assumptions...
Adam4tvs: especially on the first day of April
Bart14000: haha, that is some funny shit, i get it now
Bart14000: the last paragraph
Bart14000: you got me...
Adam4tvs: LOL
Adam4tvs: it's about time!


Are you serious? If not, this has to be the most elaborate and fucked up April Fool's joke I've ever seen, lol. How you can use numbers you dug out of a fortune cookie and hit the Lotto is beyond me. I have to say that you continue to live up to the phrase "love thy brother" by offering to share your winnings. After all the hardship you guys have gone through to now offer up part of what you get is amazing. LMK what comes of it and I'll bring the cigars, lol. Peace and blessings,


Pongoose16: omg!!!!! i can not believe you won the fucking lottery!!!
Adam4tvs: ;-)
Pongoose16: you deserve it..all the hsit you have been though in the past years
Pongoose16: im so excited for you!!
Pongoose16: so tomorrows the big day
Adam4tvs: yup
Pongoose16: you will not sleep tonight at all
Adam4tvs: i didn't sleep at all last night
Pongoose16: i dont want youre money:-)..you can keep my share
Pongoose16: buy somethin special for you and youre woman
Adam4tvs: if i win $150,000
Adam4tvs: you can buy something for YOUR woman...err man
Pongoose16: lol
Pongoose16: youre such a nice person..its about time you got a break
Pongoose16: i want some of thoes fortuine cookies
Pongoose16: you can send me some of thoes and i will play my own numbers
Adam4tvs: ;-)
Adam4tvs: keep reading - there's more!
Pongoose16: youre such a shit
Pongoose16: i even read the last paragraph and i read so fast casue i was all excited for you
Adam4tvs: LOL
Pongoose16: lol
Oh my God! I'm so happy for you! If any deserves to win a portion of the
lottery, its you. After all your work and perseverance you deserve it
man...If it isn't me winning it, I am glad it's you! Anyway, you said
address, so here ya go...
Bobbie *****
*** Rivergate Way #***
Sacramento, CA 95831
Damn...Congratulations again man!
One of your most Ardent supporters...


(she then sees me online, and continues...)
Adam4tvs: THANKS!!!!
Riker715: I just read your journal entry!
Riker715: you are one lucky son of a bitch...I also just emailed you
Adam4tvs: LOL!
Riker715: you've gotta be on cloud 9 right now
Adam4tvs: well I don't know what I win until monday
Adam4tvs: a share of $2,000,000 can be big or small
Riker715: something is better than nothing right?
Adam4tvs: of course...
Adam4tvs: did you read the last paragraph of the entry!
Riker715: yes i did
Adam4tvs: are you sure you did?
Riker715: i think so
Adam4tvs: try again...
Riker715: hang on
Riker715: about the one day you can be rude and cruel?
Adam4tvs: yeah...that would be today: April Fool's Day
Riker715: yup
Adam4tvs: ahem
Adam4tvs: April Fools
Riker715: you are shittin
Riker715: jerk! ;-)
Adam4tvs: wow - and you actually sent your address!!!
Adam4tvs: WOO HOO! LOL
And just when I thought I had heard it all. This final reaction is unthinkable. LOL:
Eshields78: Kick ass man
Adam4tvs: ;-)
Eshields78: Congrats on winnng the lottery
Adam4tvs: thanks!
Eshields78: So you will send me 100 huh??
Adam4tvs: yeah, send your address...
(here's what he sent me)

My email is eshields78@aol.com

Adam4tvs: OMG you gave me your email address
Adam4tvs: LOL
Eshields78: Yeah I did hehehe
Eshields78: delete the first email, the second says my real address
Adam4tvs: ok
Adam4tvs: keep reading! There's more...
(and his real address I did get)


Real address is **** greenleaf dr. Apt. ** Reynoldsburg Ohio 43068

Adam4tvs: ...
Adam4tvs: you get to the end? There's more...
Eshields78: sent you another email with the feedback
Adam4tvs: cool
(his feedback)
I think you winning the lottery is awsome man it just proves even when the
chips are down people can some how find a way to pull it off either with dumb
luck or most of the timein your case hard work. I wish you all the best with
the money and have fun spending it..
Adam4tvs: you really should read the whole entry dude...
Eshields78: I did read it all
Adam4tvs: try that last paragraph again man
Eshields78: Im all the way back too your home page for further reading
Adam4tvs: no the last paragraph of the ENTRY
Eshields78: The part on this date??
Eshields78: In the last 2 years
Adam4tvs: lol
Eshields78: that is coincidence from hell
(I truly lost a tiny bit of urine here. I wet myself. DUDE thinks I just happened to win the lottery on April 1st - and doesn't realize it's a joke.)
Adam4tvs: ?
Adam4tvs: it's not a coincidence man
Adam4tvs: I MADE IT UP
Eshields78: AHHH you suck LOL
Adam4tvs: HOLY SHIT
Adam4tvs: ROFL
Adam4tvs: you win man
Eshields78: What??
Adam4tvs: you by far have the best reaction
Adam4tvs: of anyone
Adam4tvs: LOL
Adam4tvs: that's CLASSIC
Eshields78: Yeah I am easily fooled
Adam4tvs: yeah but I TOLD YOU
Adam4tvs: and you thought it was a coincidence
Adam4tvs: now THAT
Adam4tvs: THAT'S a good one
Adam4tvs: sweet jesus
Adam4tvs: I think I peed my pants
Eshields78: Oh well At least I win something hehehe
Adam4tvs: LOL
Adam4tvs: that you do man
Adam4tvs: that you do...
I have to admit, I feel a TEEEENY bit bad about this. Especially since so many of you were gonna tell me to keep the money. That's so cool of all of you (not that those of you who gave me your address aren't cool - I would've sent my address - LOL). Then again, it's just too funny. Here's what really kills me, check out what I wrote on April 2nd last year:

My other idea was going to be to buy a lottery ticket and say that we had won, and that everyone who replied got $200 and anyone who gave us money would get 3 times what they gave out...I think that would've been much more cruel.

And some of you were STILL tricked. I TOLD YOU WHAT I WAS GONNA DO!!!! LOL. How funny. It of course begs the question if a threepeat is possible...I REALLY don't think so. There will be some new readers, but tihs is really getting difficult. I'm hoping that something really cool ACTUALLY does happen, and then I can joke the joke. But this may be the grand hurrah for 4tvs April Fool's Day jokes...
...but you KNOW I'm gonna try.
ALMOST FORGOT! Can't have a funny entry without a funny video! This was supposed to go directly after my surgery entry, but then Soderbergh gave that kick-ass speech, and of course the lottery video. So here it is. If you think the pain of recovering from a nasal surgery is bad...imagine THIS on top of it. Absolutely true...no foolin' - LOL.
original video file


APRIL 2001