OK! I have to
write about this now! I can't keep ignoring it, 'cause
it's blowing me away.
I may or may not
have mentioned that Ron Gamble (Loyal Late Show
Listener) wrote about Palaur in his Wrestling column
on 411wrestling.com. Not sure WHY, as the only
wrestling in Palaur is of a "different" nature, but he
thought he'd pass it on to his fellow Wrestling freaks
as a great online experience. What has followed, since
I knew nothing of him doing this, is a series of
emails out of the blue that have really effected me.
The first ones were rather funny: "YOOU DICK, how
could you do this." - And I'm all thinking: Huh? Who
are you and what did I do. Took a moment to
realize that they were talking about
Palaur.
More recently
however I've been getting amazing reactions. People
are sincerely moved by the music, by the story, the
emotion is incredible. People are angry, pissed, every
emotion you can have. I keep getting the emails, and I
keep reading them in utter amazement. Why? Well that's
character development moment #209.
I was
UBER-passionate about Palaur.com when I first finished
it. I knew that it was special. I knew there was the
ability to take people on such a journey, that no
other medium could do. To make you laugh, cry, SPIT,
just everything. From so many angles, the instant
messages, the music, the movies, the entries within,
from every side you felt that experience- - you were
there.
Of course, by the
end I just gave the thing away. I was sick of
dealing with asshole credit card billing companies
screwing people over. Not getting my checks - it was
one headache after another. It made Palaur so damn
convuluted that no one could get through it. AHHH. I
just opened it all up - made it free and hoped people
would enjoy it. I really never heard from it again.
LOL. From time to time one person would catch it and
we would talk. But seriously, 2 years passed and what
I was once so passionate about was a distant
memory.
Then this happens.
And there's more reaction to Palaur now then there was
when I originally put it up. And strangely enough -
from MEN. I was pretty certain that this was a "Chick"
site. It doesn't strike me as something most men would
dig - but wow was I wrong. So many men have been
through this and relate. I'm getting emails from what
I picture as the manliest of men: Wrestling junkies,
talking about crying reading some of the passages.
Welling up listening to some of my songs. It's so
amazing to me.
So I of course
went back and listened to some of those songs, and
wow. I'm right there again. What makes the songs so
incredible is you, for the first time, see EXACTLY
what made that song. You see all the events, hear all
the events, read all the events that lead to me
finally needing to write. It makes the song THAT much
more touching. Specifically because I'm NOT generic. I
don't write relatable very often. I speak SPECIFICALLY
to what I'm singing about not worrying that others may
not know the back story. It's a curse of a true writer
who doesn't want to confrom to Top 40 for sure, but
when you KNOW the background...wow. The song
becomes so much more real.
So the
emails keep trickling in, and I am just
revelling in it. It's amazing that a bunch
of absolute strangers can effect
me
so deeply. Feedback is king to me. To know
that these guys, unknowingly just started
reading, couldn't stop, and felt
ALL the emotions I did - that's
basically, in a nutshell, what I live for.
That is the mutha-fuckin' oscar to me. The
more people that feel that from something
I created, the happier and more satisfied
I am creatively. Money will never replace
that. Ever.
Ok, this is just
my long-winded way of saying thanks, and slowly
finding out who the hell I am. Funny, I knew
that when I was 20, but now all the sudden I'm
clueless again. It's amazing how people can effect you
ain't it.
Moving on. In
"OH-MY-GOD-YOU'RE-A-LOSER" News, I'm actually in the
newest issue of Nintendo Power. My first national
publication exposure is in a fucking videogame
magazine. I am pretty jizzy about it. LOL. Gettin'
Jizzy with it. Ha! I remember bringing the first issue
of Nintendo Power to school in 6th grade. Super Mario
Bros. 2 on the cover. 157 issues later, and I'm in it.
That's nuts. It's tiny, but it's me:
There I
am, beating the other 3 senseless to win my
WaveBird.
Here of course is
the cover of the magazine (Issue 158), if you'd like
to pick one up to add to your Adam Kontras scrapbook -
ROFL:
Where's
Waldo?
And here is the
infamous page 35 in which I make my TINY
debut:
I'm still shaking
my head at it all. As well there's video of me winning
it on the Planet GameCube DVD. Duh, I made it. LOL.
Like I was keeping THAT off. Heh. It's amazing how
into gaming I am, and how little time I actually
spend playing. I seriously read more about it then
I hold a controller. There's something so strange
about that.
In 4tvs news, I'm
outlining the parts of the new show and starting to
gather all the video material. What a mess. As well
I'm putting together the Trinitrons DVD that I'll
release in Columbus when I come back this fall. End of
August/early September. Planning on doing The
Trinitrons DVD release party type thingee for
everyone. The DVD is gonna rule. Now to find just what
parts to use. Quite a headache. So many shows to
choose from. Hard to know even where to
begin.
Ok, so I got lots
to do. Thanks to the wrestlers for lifting me up a
bit. And of course, thank you Ron. I miss
ya.
