You
look up and all the sudden you've got
loose ends everywhere. Welcome to being
incredibly busy...oh and trying to
chronicle your life as a real-time soap
opera. So lemme play a little Christmas
Catch-Up...
First
of all,
Shizzle.
Him being the angel is just too damn cute.
It's one of those things you do, that when
other people see it they think: "Oh isn't
that a healthy way to deal with the death
of a dog, how sweet." ...unfortunately
that's bullshit. Truth be told, I am
actually worse off about it all then
I was earlier in the month. It's so
embarrassing to me I can barely write
about it. I am grieving so hard, so
long, and so...alone. It's crying in the
shower, or in my car - hiding. I'm
devastated. I'm in total denial,
I expect him to run in daily. I
realize too late that what I really
want to do at a given moment is wrestle
with him...and he's not there.
I could write
volumes, but I stop myself constantly...and will
stop myself now. This Journey is supposed to be a true
representation of me and it just has to be said that
you should envision a shattered man struggling in
private daily. I am astonished that I'm reacting so
emotionally to a pet. I guess I never
allowed myself to even think of losing him and in turn
had no idea what he meant to me. He really was my
reflection.
Alright - other
updates. I guess we'll continue in dog news.
CeBe
is doin' just fine, although I haven't been able
to catch her peein' and poopin' on the rug enough to
fully house train her. In case you're wondering, the
Kontras method of house training is very simple. Catch
'em in the act...and scare the bejeezus out of 'em by
yelling in their face. I know, seems kinda cruel
to scream an inch from a puppy's face...but it really
works. Dogs are smart...they get it.
REALLY QUICK. You catch 'em a couple times, and
yell at 'em all the way to the backyard? You're FINE.
Having a doggy-door giving them free reign in and out
helps out too. Roxy is as sweet as can be. She's so
loving and gentle as this little terror goes all
"puppy" on her. It's heartwarming. And the noises
this puppy makes are just adorable. When she growls
she sounds like a gremlin, and when she yawns it's
this mix of cat and baby. So cute.
CBS.
Dahhh. The locked entries. Those last 2 locked entries
are AWESOME, but I haven't the slightest idea when
they can ever be unlocked. It's going very well but
has some interesting challenges that you'd just never
expect. As I've hinted at...the fight never ends. You
have to scheme every second and push, push, push.
Although that's kinda fun...it's also a bit much. I
love staying hungry and fighting for more... but you
really do end up in a "never smelling the roses"
routine and I've waited so damn long to smell them you
know? Like everything else in life - it's a balance.
DAH... I can't hide this part of the locked
emails from you though. Guess what the VP wrote to the
segment producer a couple weeks back:
"Loved
the Adam part two…pass it on to the folks in
la…we will be working for him some
day"
How AWESOME
is that? What a ride.
Keith Coast
Superstar
unfortunately did not get The Panic Channel gig. His
lack of touring experience ended up being the biggest
variable against him. Always sucks when experience is
a factor you know? 'Cause how do you get touring
experience? YOU GO ON TOUR. lol. But
it's a pretty big 7 week tour and I do understand
them wanting to get someone whose been down that road
before. They went with a guy in his mid-30s in a
somewhat popular band that's been touring for years.
It makes sense. They know he won't leave 'em hanging.
Image was also an issue (they're all pushin' 40) and I
can imagine he would stick out like a sore thumb...
but the thing that rocks in all this is one,
indisputable fact: They said he blew everyone out of
the water. They were floored by how good he was and
want to use him for other things. As I said
before in his entry, he's just that good. It's only a
matter of time before the name "Keith Chandler" gets
out into the community and he finds his niche. And
since I've been talking so much shit about him
I figured it was time to let you guys really know
what I mean which is why we did the Fiona Apple
song last night. I'm certain there will be more in the
future.
Doobe-doobe-doo...
whatever could I be missing....
(sigh)
So you may have
noticed a locked entry... a blacked out entry... an
angry lookin' song... and an extreme lack of
"Donna" news. Things have been bumpy to say the
least. Truth be told, and it breaks my heart to say
this, New York was anything but "Fairy Tale" and since
the day I met her it has been the struggle of a
lifetime. I have been both the most miserable I've
been in years and the most happy I've ever known. It's
the definition of schizophrenic and I've had to avoid
her all together in these entries because every
sentence I could write would turn into the exact
opposite the next day. Just thinking about these past
3 months has me dizzy. In the new year we'll both
write another entry... of course assuming she's still
here. Yes, it's been that bad. Strange though, now
that sentence seems cruel somehow. We've had a really
great week and for us - that's more than we've ever
had. We're taking one day at a time and I love
her to death. I can honestly say I believe she's "The
One" as I put in the Christmas
Picture...
...of course she
may be "The One" that leads me to heroin, but she's
the one all the same. ;-)
Ain't love
grand.
Adam
PS -
she got me a leafblower for Christmas and
I swear to you I felt like an 8
year old with a new toy. Oh my
GOD HOW FUN. I've had to sweep
that driveway for 4 years now and
I never would have bought myself a
leaf-blower thinking a broom was good
enough - BUT NEVA!!!! POWER!!!
I think that officially makes
me...like a dad? An adult? As I was
blowing the leaves around and it occured
to me that getting a leaf-blower was more
exciting to me than playing with my
Nintendo Wii...
...one day it just
happens to all of us I guess. Funny
stuff.
