- 10:05 PM,
Saturday, April 29th, 2006:
-
- My first bump! You
know you're in a good mood when a scheduled appearence
on a national television show gets bumped because of
unforseen news stories...and you're totally OK with it
because at least now you can write an entry explaining
everything. I've literally had so much happen within
24 hour periods that not only couldn't I write about
them in time, but I couldn't give each thing it's own
entry. Thus the last entry (which will be my favorite
for some time) turns into this weird juxtaposition in
which shit was happening while I was
trying to write about another big event. What a
whirlwind.
-
- So you all have to
be asking - WHAT THE HELL!?! Didn't you just
say you couldn't say yes?! What made you change your
mind!??! Have you just given up on the talent show and
become crazy activist man?!?!
-
- Not exactly.
Charlotte was finally able to speak with some people
at the show and they said unequivocally that going on
TV wouldn't hurt my chances in the least. In fact it
could even be seen as a positive. That was pretty much
all I needed. Unfortunately there are still no
definites on if I'm in, as callbacks are still weeks
away...but again as we know, they singled me out - did
an interview, filmed a bit with me rollin' my TVs up
to the desk, so I feel as good as I did back on
the 9th. They have to do their job and keep some
suspense, so I just gotta have faith. Cue George
Michael song.
-
- This was Thursday.
I had taken the day off work simply because I was
so fried that I needed a day and there was literally
nothing I could do at work except start new
loans, and I wasn't about to do that. It was so
funny, as Charlotte was talking to me about the
conversation with the producer, my little brain's
synapses started to fire and I realized what she was
saying: it's cool to go on MSNBC. That wasn't really
why she even called - we were just being investigators
so I had no idea this was what was gonna come of it.
My synapses went to my legs and I just started to
hop. I wanted to do the Olbermann show so bad and
it was literally killing me that I had to stall.
I hung up and let out a scuh-REAAAAAAAM.
I then called the producer back and she said she
would call me back in just a minute which set-up a
lovely moment.
-
- I'm a pacer on the
phone anyway. Something about my mind racing
that makes my legs race and I unknowingly start to
pace. But with this? I was competitive
pacing. Shizzle was runnin' behind me wondering what
was gonna happen in the next room only to find
I was gonna turn around and just go back. It was
an awfully confusing time for the puppy. Finally, she
called back.
-
-
-
- LOL.
-
- She
pre-interviewed me, let me know they found the song on
a military site and thought they had something
to do with it...then searched my name, found the site
and voila. Told her how I wrote it, told her what 4tvs
was... normal stuff. Afterwards she actually asked if
they could interview me. I know it's just
protocal and she was being polite but given...oh the
last 6 1/2 years of this journey - it struck me as one
of the top ten most ironic moments of my life.
I said "yes". She said they wnated to interview
me TOMORROW at 5:45 to which I replied... "OOOH,
am I gonna be high on the countdown?!?!?" She
giggled. She said they'd have someone pick me up and
that one of 2 or 3 producers would give me a call
during the day to confirm. And like that... it was
over.
-
- As you can see in
the video (gotta love getting the moment on
tape like that) it was so matter of fact and on the
phone it was as if I was making plans to go to
the movies the next day. Inside of course
I freaked out. Called EVVVVVERYONE. Then, just
when you think it can't get any better - she calls
BACK and says: "We're gonna use your song as part of a
segment on protest videos tonight" Again calm and
collected I go: "Oh great I'll check it out!". I
then continue the calls. I think I used 450
minutes of cell time in a 24 hour period. As I'm
typing to people online, and writing the last entry,
Cass runs in to set the TiVo. Countdown starts and the
teaser for "Let's Bomb Iran" comes on and they
actually use the "Away Go the colored people" line.
I hear this OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH MY GOD
from cassi who runs from the house into the studio.
LOL. It was so awesome. I however, am totally cool.
Albeit, the kind of cool you are when aliens land in
your backyard and your mind just can't comprehend it,
but still - totally cool. She stayed in here while
they ran the bit and I was totally in awe.
I expected 10-15 seconds of the chorus. I was
wrong...
-
- ...they played the
whole minute opening and a full chorus. The entire
time I stared at the TV with my jaw dropped
thinking: "OMG, when are they gonna pull away!?!"
I was so amazed with everything they played. Of
course the second it was over - the calls came a
comin'. Strangely, the first guy that called me was
the Justice Through Music guy!??! Strange huh? Just
amazing. People were IM'ing me with basically the same
reaction as me:
"I CANT BELIEVE THEY JUST PLAYED THE COLORED PEOPLE LINE".
-
- It was insane. Of
course sunuvabitch - although I want to make the
entry and call people and write... I have to
emceeing the spelling bee thing. DAH!!!! So I scurry
off to do that. It was pretty cool actually, I had a
blast and was in the mood of all moods boy. There was
an after party but all I could think of doing was
running out and calling my dad who was watching a
re-run of the show at midnight EST. We were both
speechless. Speechless for a Kontras man however means
we just talk for 2 hours about how speechless we are.
LOL. It was that moment man... that "This is
it" moment. I had that moment with The Comedy
Store and I wondered if I'd ever feel it again and
within 3 weeks I feel it twice. This time however
it was even bigger because MORE was on the
horizon. We just sat there talking about the past 6
years and how you just never could have dreamed this
would be how things would start to break. I could've
talked with him for hours. I finally put my
finger on what it is:
-
- The Journey for
any artist is literally a series of shit on your
shoulders that you hold up. It gets heavier over time.
It got so heavy last year that I had to put it
down and just decompress. Workout my shoulders a bit
more. When America's Got Talent hit I had to make that
choice to pick it all back up and put years of crap on
my shoulders again. I hesitated for a second, but knew
it was the right thing to do. When the audition worked
out a little hole in the big barrel of crap actually
opened up and my load lightened. Several years just
seeped out. I think all of 2002 and a little of 2003
in the period of one day just vanished. I stood
up a little straighter. Then this moment? Even more.
Years and years of struggle start to slowly lower on
your scale of "stuff that matters" and the relief is
amazing. That's what this phone call was. Talking
about what I was gonna say on the show, what it
all meant - how it was all going to play. Just
realizing that I was now a voice that represented more
people...it's awesome.
-
- See, that's all
media is. It tracks feelings and trends - and one
subject equals thousands. It's unfair, and certainly
inexact, but it's the truth. So to explain the story
of the artistic movement towards protest I, alone,
represented every single artist that wasn't yet
"mainstream". In one clip, in one song. Then they went
on to talk about Neil Young, Pink the dixie
chicks...and of course talk about the people that
won't speak out. That feeling is awesome and
I just could not wait to talk about it the
next day.
-
- Sleeping was
actually pretty good. I was very tired, and
honestly because I felt good about America's Got
talent, and obviously good about MSNBC...I was
totally not antsy. Antsy comes from not knowing.
Big-time. I gave my best to the talent show and
they made it clear that any "anti-american" vibe
from an appearence on MSNBC wouldn't hurt me in the
least....so I was just chilled. Watched the end of the
Clippers game (Holy shit if the Lakers play the
Clippers in the 2nd round!!!!) and had no problem
falling asleep. However, when my eyes opened at 4:45
AM...I started going over what was about to happen and
well... yeah - that was the end of my 4 hour sleep.
LOL. This is the first time I've ever been interviewed
on national television so I'm obviously curious as to
how it will play out, but it isn't nervousness - this
is where my talk radio experience is gonna help me
soooooooooooo much. I have NO problem sitting and
talking about topics without rehearsing. In fact I
actually prefer it. Charlotte was quizzin me on
what I was gonna say and although I really did
have to go right then, there's nothing to quiz. I know
a couple points I want to get across - but she's
gotta understand that this was my job for 5
years. This is the easy part. This is the fun part. My
biggest concern? Is wiping that shit eating grin off
my face when they first cut to me. Like, I'm so
goddamn happy I can't contain myself. I mean - I
love his show. It's a show I actually watch and
I think he's awesome... just - WOW.
-
- So all day
I just played questions in my mind, talked to
myself...and just enjoyed the hype of it all.
I was so happy. Every now and then I'd also
realize there's the talent show to look forward to...
WOW. Just a wonderful day for me. Of course
I couldn't call anyone as I had literally 7
minutes left on my plan until the weekend started and
was constantly monitoring it on the verizon website.
LOL. I watched Bush's press conference (where I must
say, he actually came off incredibly well) and thought
to myself: "I may be able to use something here
when I'm on later..." It was just surreal. Of course
not long after that I got the call from the
producer that they had to cancel my bit because just
too many news stories were coming in. I later saw
that Rush Limbaugh was arrested and the Iranian
president said another "fuck off" to the world...
I understood. I asked when we'd reschedule
and she said: Well Amy called you so expect to
hear from her next week. I was in such a happy mood it
barely phased me. But I did of course over-analyze
things....
-
- On
MSNBC.com they now had the previous day's
"protest songs" bit up they had cut out my part at the
beginning. Were there complaints about the "colored
people" line? Were they just being nice and
letting me down easy? Jesus, why do I have to
treat everything like an S.A.T. math problem? I
always do this. Come up with every possible
scenario trying to be a step-ahead of the game. Adam,
calm down. Megga-dittos got fuckin' arrested for drugs
AGAIN - it's an unexpected new spot on the
countdown...you got bumped.
THEY CALLED YOU DUDE. You'll be
fine. But it doesn't hurt to play conspiracy theorist
every now and then. ;-)
-
- So I tried to
call everyone I could to let them know it was
bumped. God that sucks. I've heard of people on the
Tonight Show or David Letterman that are actually
IN the greenroom and get bumped because someone
talks too long. Imagine THAT. Ha! Everyone was so
giddy anyway that we just laughed and looked forward
to next week. And honestly, and I'm not trying to
sugar-coat it, it's good to space it out. Seriously
back-to-back exposure has a little less bang for the
buck than seperate weeks.
-
- And of course, it
allowed me to write this entry. This entry was gonna
be the whole event of being on TV mixed with all this
- and it's just too much. This is a special entry. I'm
so glad it's on tape. I know it sounds strange but
I see the guy on the screen, Adam, as much like a
character as you all do. In real-time I don't
obviously, but when I edit it all down and
compress the video and upload it....then watch it
after rereading the entry? I am sooooo happy for that
guy. Because I've watched him go through hell for so
long...and he deserves these moments. It literally
feels like a completely different person.
-
 -
- Way to go man. You
really do deserve it. And to think, the moments that
are coming...
-
- ...I'll save that
for another entry.
-
- ;-)
-
- Adam
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