COME ON DOWN for NINE FRIGGIN' HOURS on
metal benches to be part of the biggest waste of a
because you got to see the Price is Right dawg. And
that's what livin' in Hollywood is all
preface all of this by mentioning my cousin Andrea is
literally the biggest Price is Right fan I've ever
known in my life. Celebrates Bob's birthday (December
12th), I shit you not. Nothin' she would love more in
her LIFE than go to this show...and to actually
get picked as a contestant? She'd be able to die...yet
wouldn't be able to bid because she'd be crying so
damn much. She's wanted to come out and visit since
the day I got here and has never been able to
pull it off. I felt almost guilty goin' without her,
but I too dig The Price is Right and I figured with
all this time off I might as well take a stab at
it. Little did I know, I would NEED all that
time off. Good fuck people, check this
1) Cassi went
to the website and we requested tickets. We then
got the ticket confirmation and all was good. For
most shows, this is it...you go a little early and
line up with your confirmation. Not on the #1 Game
Show in the world...
2) Then you
HAVE to go down there as early as possible to get
your "Time of Arrival" number. Gates open at 6 AM.
We got there at 6:30 AM and we got 158 and 159.
Fuuuck. People there since Midnight the night
before. Realize, that these are people that
ALREADY HAD TICKETS. But that ticket you
get online (or by writing a letter) simply gives
you the priviledge to get a Time of Arrival
3) Now, that
number, allows you to come back at 8 AM to get your
PRIORITY NUMBER. After you get your priority
number, which was 149 and 150 for me and Cassi as a
few people ahead of us were confused (imagine that)
- you then get to come back at 10 AM. Now realize
there aren't 2 hours in between here. It takes
forever to get each number, so you basically have
like 30 minutes because you sure as hell are coming
back EARLIER than 10 AM.
4) Then they
count the "groups". Now depending on how many
groups there are (which are guaranteed) oh and the
"hollywood ticket people" (I guess those are VIPs)
they can only take SO MANY of the priority
people. Today - the line was cut off around 185 or
so. So that means that everyone who got their
tickets online, got a Time arrival Number, then
came back and got a priority number, then came back
at 10 AM and were over 185? Bye. You lose. Price is
Wrong. Insanity. Those people were allowed to be
"Standbye" and at noon the guy came and said -
sorry, no stand-byes.
5) This is all
for ONE TAPING mind you. Now once you come
back at 10 AM they go through each person and check
their ID and social security numbers and
around 12:30 - 1:00 they give you the infamous
NAME TAGS. Literally the only reason
I wanted to go through this. I've always
wanted one of those name tags man. I'm framing
6) Then around
1:00 PM they start interviewing everyone in groups
of 12. This is to be on the show. They ask your
name, what you do for a living... And you move on.
In that few moments you either get chosen or not.
Cassi and I decided making shirts would help
our cause. Hers was the ever popular "show love for
was a bit more twisted (imagine that):
I mean the
man says it after every show, I thought it couldn't
hurt. Of course once I realized that there
were 340 people, and only 9 contestants I stopped
even stressing about it. The chances were
astronomical and as it stands they ended up
choosing nearly all young bouncy girls and only one
late 20's early 30's guy...and it wasn't me. LOL.
Cassi wasn't a contestant either but they picked
her out to dance onstage before the show. So she
has stepped onto the infamous Price is Right stage.
She too can die now.
7) After they
interview your group, you move onto even more
benches. Cold, hard silver benches with red
railing. I'll never forget 'em. Finally around 2:15
you start filing in...
I would've sworn was the "fake" Price is Right
set. Obviously the "new" set that was 10 times smaller
than the one on TV. Man, there are no words to
describe how fucking HUGE Price is Right looks on TV
and how inSANELY small it is. Guys, I'd venture to
say, that most high school theaters are bigger than
this set. It is so small and SOOO crowded with
TV cameras. It is the most glaring example of the
"magic of television" I've ever seen.
I swear to you, I thought without a doubt that it
was a different stage than I had watched my whole
life. I was actually bummed that I had
somehow procrastinated coming to the show for sooooo
long, that I missed out on the old BIGGER one.
That is until the show started and I watched it
on TV and my jaw dropped. It was the same set. What
got me was the audience section. They make that look
so BIG and sso absolutely gigantic! The trick is, they
photograph it from the floor of the stage, so it looks
so looming...but it's not at ALL. It is TINY. And the
stage? Oh my GOD is it tiny. They create
ALL the size of that stage with depth, not width.
It's brilliant actually. I'm still amazed.
But nothing could
compare to just how goooooooood Bob Barker was. During
commercial breaks he would "play the crowd" and was
just...shockingly "on". I mean he's 82 and his
timing was just...so hip. It's like he knows everyone
thinks he's old...and can just turn it around so fast.
During a commercial break someone yelled out for him
to do the "Happy Gilmore" line and he said:
"No, I don't talk like that, it's only for the
movies." After much prodding he finally said:
"Listen, the standards and practices lady is over
here, if she says it's OK, I'll say it." He then turns
and says: "They want me to say 'The Price is Right
bitch, and I'm not gonna say it". He was pulling our
leg the whole time.
One of the
contestants was weraing a "Vote for Pedro" shirt
from Napoleon Dynamite that had Pedro crossed out and
BOB written over it. We all knew this girl, Cassi
and I actually ate breakfast with her - she was
very outgoing and funny. At another commercial break,
Bob just looks at her and says: "Who the hell is
Pedro?". And later took out the "hell" for when
the cameras came back on. His interraction with the
audience was just so fast.
During the show we
got to witness two rarities: a perfect $1.00 spin, and
a "perfect bid"...which apparently garners you $500
now? When I used to watch the show it was $100 and
I actually said in the middle of the show: "It's
$500 now?!?!?!" and he responded live on the air,
"Yesssssss, it's $500 now..." - I really hope
that comes through because I said it FUGGIN loud
and was genuinely suprised. Unfortunately, no plinko.
Man, before every game I was yellin:
"PLINKO BOB. PLIN-KO" Goddamn I love Plinko.
Does it get any better than Plinko? HELL no. But
alas, no plinko for Adam.
The show airs
February 10th, and I'll be sure to tape it and zoom in
on where we were sitting. One dude who was picked was
pretty close to us so there should be some good shots.
As much as I'd love to go again to try and be a
contestant...there's just no way I'm getting up at
4:30 AM for a series hoops like no other. At least
I got to see it, and it was certainly
of fun...go get some mentos and a 2 liter
and watch the fun blow out of a bottle.
Paddy and I saw it on TV, didn't believe
it and had to do
holy shit it works. You put a bunch of
mentos in carbonation and the universe
explodes. Good times.