YouTube link added 02.11.09
9:57 PM, Thursday, April 17th, 2003:
I knew this was the incorrect choice going in. But I procrastinated too long and was stuck not making an appointment for my title transfer at the DMV. I would have to wait in line. Didn't really bother me, I actually enjoy lines when I'm ready for them. I love seeing people get pissed. It's the highlight of my day. The post office is the fuggin' best man…people get so shitty there. And I'm always thinking: "Don't you watch the news? These are not the people you wanna piss off".
But I truly wasn't prepared for this madhouse. I got there at 1:45 (half-day at work), and waited in line for 30 minutes to get a number. My number was B396. There were 10 letters A-J all with numbers in the hundreds. We were at B223 when I walked in. I sit down, and some dude says he's been there since 11 AM. I then watched the TV monitor for 15 minutes and watch B go to 226 in that time. All the other numbers edged up too. Simple arithmetic told me there were not only 170 B's ahead of me (whatever the hell that means) but probably a good 700 people in all ahead of me. Is that crazy or what? This is just for the city of Van Nuys. I know, I know - should have gone to Simi Valley (what everyone's been telling me 'round here).
So I get in my car and leave, go home check my email. Go to Subway and get a sandwich, then remembered about my portable DVD player. Grabbed that and the first season of Awful Truth with Michael Moore and hurried back. Guess where the numbers were after an hour?
No problem, I just sat in a corner and watched my personalized TV show, feeling quite embarrassed at a particular episode where Michael took a bunch of gay guys around in a sodomobile to all the states that still had sodomy laws and proceeded to shove it in people's faces. Quite funny, but still a little uncomfortable with people looking over your shoulder. Especially since I had headphones on, so it wasn't really clear why I was watching a big pink bus full of guys making out. Heh.
After 6 episodes, my battery finally died. And yet I still waited. That's right. 4 hours. At 5:45 after they had already closed, my number finally came up and it took roughly 5 minutes to sign it all over. Why the hell couldn't this be done through the mail or on the net? I mean I can do my TAXES online without ever signing my name, but I can't get a CAR title transferred? (sigh)
What really kills me is once they locked the doors at 5:30, they started kicking ever-lovin' ass. Every window was flying and the numbers sped up to 4 times the speed. Nothin' like quitin' time to make people actually WORK for a living. Anyway, I know this certainly didn't deserve a whole entry - but you have to find some way to make a 4 hour wait at the DMV not a total waste of your life.
And I just have to give a nice "what the fuck" to Mr. Jordan for last night. Why did you even bother to suit up dawg? I completely expected him to have one last hurrah. I expected him to swat at every ball. And expend every bit of energy he had left. Dude sat out the entire 4th quarter. Oh I'm sorry, except for 50 seconds in what was just embarrassing. A set-up, put him in and foul him, so he ends it at the line and then take him out pile-o-shit. This is the same guy that 2 weeks ago scored 39 in New York while smashing his head against the floor to get loose balls. I realize this game had no playoff meaning, but come on man - if you're gonna play, play all out. Whether you score 30 or 20, playing all out is what makes you…you.
On the other hand, he's obviously tired. He's worked 5 times harder than anyone should have to play at ANY age. He's playing as hard as he did when he entered the league almost 20 years ago, because the guys around him SUCK. He played all 82 games and clawed his way to 20 points a game on an aching, aging body. On just about any other team, he would be the X-factor in the playoffs. Unfortunately, he's on the most immature team in the Eastern Conference. And in a conference where 41-41 gets you into the playoffs, that's saying something. No matter what, I'll always remember my tape of the New York game a few weeks back where a 40 year old man outplayed everyone on the court, but came up a point shy because a bunch of idiots couldn't out-hussle a freakin'… well a freakin' 40 year old man. I'm glad he came back. He played better than I thought anyone at 40 could play.
Oh and by the way - screw all of you who said 60 days would fly by. Guess what's still a goddamn month away. I realize I am by nature a tad impatient, but anyway you look at it - a 60 day escrow is not quick.
Man, who'dve thunk it. This year is so surreal. Take the discipline of "The Journey", the entries, the videos...and place it in DOMESTIC-VILLE with videos of houses, and the drama of the DMV and 60 Day Escrows. LOL. How utterly boring. Heh. Welcome to Part 2: The Boredom continues.