locked until 08.15.04 -
YouTube
link added
02.09.09
1:15 PM, Friday
July 30th, 2004:
Good lord am I
ever going to escape this month? Is anyone EVER going
to read all of this? Do I even give a shit?
Man - I got
bitch-slapped last night. Hard. I was driving
around up near where Jess and I first moved to LA and
it popped in my head of showing our kid the area. And
how driving in that car would be "family"...that it
didn't matter where the road was. It occurred to me
that at that moment, Jess may be sitting in Columbus
thinking the same thing. My heart grew about three
sizes. Kids are so damn important to me and part of me
knows the rest of our problems will work themselves
out with so much friggin' love between us. Even if at
times it seems like only friends. I told myself that
if Jess came home and said she truly believed after
hanging in Columbus that she could handle having a
family out here while only visiting Columbus - I'd
believe her.
And that was
weighing on my head too. She said she could before,
and I didn't trust her. It sucks to not trust your
wife. And she's made every effort to make a family out
here work...I just don't believe once the hormones
kick in during pregnancy that we'll make it to the
second trimester without filling up a
U-Haul.
So I called her
up. Guess what she wasn't feeling. Ugh. She even
talked about the apartments she saw and how much she
wanted extended family part of her life and her
children's life. I actually winced. It felt like
someone had cheated on me. Felt mind you, I was the
one who friggin' told her to go home and do this so
she in no way cheated on me. But for a small moment I
thought she would come back and say she coudln't
possibly have a family in Columbus without me. It was
the opposite. She wants me desperately to want a
family with her...in Columbus. She even said what she
hadn't said in a long time - that the other problems
were worth working on...if we were in Columbus. And
she said it right as I was saying that the problems
were worth working on...if we were in Los Angeles.
Heavy shit.
I tell Greg the animator dude who I've known
since 2001 I believe. Story board guy for Family
Guy. He's in a peculiar situation. He's successful. He
knew exactly what he wanted to do out here, and did
it. And is now comfortable, has a house, everything's
kickin' ass...but he's still single. Still lookin' for
that kick-ass person to share your time with. His
reaction to all this?
GO THE FUCK BACK TO OHIO DUDE.
I mean from his
perspective, I haven't done DICK out here and I'm
gonna give up a precious human connection with someone
for...for nothing? I asked him if he'd go back to
Michigan (where he's from) and he said "no" but he's
already successful. It's different.
Well he does have
me here. But therein lies a major rub. If I was
successful - say I got the G4 job, had my own
show and was doing very well career wise....Jess would
be miserable. I would be gone quite a bit of the time.
She thinks she feels isolated now? Once I do get into
the right project for my talents...look out people -
I'll throw myself in it. She'll hardly ever see me and
I guarantee Jess will want to go back then. It's
lose-lose. I can't possibly save this unless I'm
willing to go back...
...and I have
searched the outer most regions of my soul I
SWEAR TO YOU, for anything, anything that
would fulfill me (other than Jess) in that city. If
I had a baby in my arms at this moment, I could
justify it. I could say "ahh well...I gave it a GREAT
shot" and move back ready to enjoy all the comforts of
home. But I can't now. Even though I have nothing
tangible to show for my work out here in 5 years,
other than some cool shows I could've just as easily
created in Columbus, I know my talents will make it on
a national level. I know, I know, I know. And if 5
years of this WRETCHED fuckin city hasn't dampened
that, nothing will.
But it still keeps
haunting me what Greg said man. He has what I want,
and I'm basically turning my back on what he wants.
It's amazing really. I forget what it feels like to be
alone I guess, because I've only felt it for very
short amounts of time. Months really. But what really
haunts me about what he said, is that I'm not
successful...so what am I doing sacrificing the good
things in my life? But man, I don't feel unsuccessful.
That's the point. I've never measured all of my worth
on "making it". It is indeed the goal, and I will in
time, but that superficial moment where I've made it
won't make me feel like anything but a guy who worked
the system to his advantage. The real success lies in
me as an artist and what I've accomplished in ten
years. When I look at www.adamazon.com I see
a lifetime slammed into a decade and I can't wait to
see what future decades bring.
...but those
projects would never have been made if I knew my
ceiling was DJ in Columbus. The things I've produced
out here have a sense of ambition to them that only
this struggle can provide. Even the stuff when I was
in Columbus was me dreaming and driving towards a
greater good. I fully believed "Stronger Than Before"
was my ticket. That's what made it what it was. How
could I have sung those songs, and written those
liner notes if I believed I couldn't leave that
city?
So I'm saying the
love for my career is greater than my love for
Jessica. That is the sentence I have to be able
to type in order for this to happen. If I only
had one love, this fuckin' city would be the one I
would choose because I can't have both. For a
romantic like me that is hard to swallow...but I'm
afraid it has been digested and is the absolute truth.
Yes, I may kick myself in a year when I'm alone, going
nowhere, and hating the single life in LA...but in my
heart of hearts - there is no compromise. I know
it involves extreme projection to think of me sitting
in Columbus in 2006 with a kid and a 9-5...but that is
what I see and it is a nightmare. I will be a basket
case.
So this has to be
it. This has to be the last wrinkle in this story.
This is like the last days of Palaur man. Where the
story just kept on going, when the audience knew it
was fuggin' DONE. If only you guys knew what this felt
like...
Adam
PS -
what a video.
After I wrote this entry I went
to my G4 meeting and took my camera "just
in case". Ya never know what you'll see.
Anyway as I was driving home
I set up the camera behind my
steering wheel in my dash and listened to
"Impossible" from Hearing My Thoughts. It
was about my divorce from Burgundie and
might be the saddest song I've ever
friggin' written.
However it had a
whole new meaning as I listened to it. I was
now singing FOR Jess, and I had become
Burgundie. I started all this and she was the one
getting wallopped as I was in 1997. Not like I'm not
feelin' the same crap, but I just felt so
insanely empathetic to her at this moment. Thus, the
video. Lotsa symbolism stuck in there...