First three
entries of this month were a no-brainer huh? Anyone
would've made the same choice, right? What if that
choice, and even having an agent means you
never even get the chance to make the pilot?
Inconceiveable right?
It's now over a
week without a word from Josh at 3 Arts, and with no
response to an email it occurs to you that no matter
how much "business-sense" the actions may have been...
Journey-sense is totally different. What does Journey
Adam care about a bad deal? It means he has a fucking
deal. If Josh calls Jim and finds that it really was a
favor to Gary and that he's put-off for me going
"behind Gary's back"? Was my agent right? She
emphatically thinks so because she sees just the
deal-memo. She doesn't see 10 years of struggling for
just an opportunity to showcase my stuff...
which I finally GOT. She doesn't even consider
re-negotiating with Weller-Grossman because in her
world? It's a bad contract, she's looking out for my
best BUSINESS interests. But at the end of the day, if
I lose everything, what would Journey Adam have
chosen? Bad Weller-Grossman contract or the knowledge
that I didn't sign that bad contract?
At the time it
didn't seem like much of a risk in all honesty. Alisa
straight up said she didn't know what more she could
do wtih Weller-Grossman. They said there would be no
budget, etc. But a couple thousand bucks? I'll fund it
AND I'll sign a bad contract. Unthinkable to an agent
at Paradigm. Unthinkable. But they don't live with the
alternative. They go back to their plethora of
super-deals and clients. I start over, completely from
scratch... and? I don't have an agent, I don't have a
management company, and I don't have a production
company. I have yet to sign anything. That's right, I
have yet to be offered a contract from Paradigm.
Nervous yet?
That's
why this song just no longer rings true.
It can't once you've been to a certain
level. When I wrote it I had nothing... so
of course I'm ok with being "alright" jut
having The Journey. But not anymore. All I
had to do was sign a contract, fund the
shoot (which is ridiculous business wise,
I know) and I would've had a pilot on
fucking Comedy Central. One that everyone
reading this knows would've been picked up
because of how revolutionary and different
it was. How the FUCK will I be "alright"
if it all vanishes? And when all I had to
do was sign the contract!??!?!?
I will not be alright. I will
be ANYTHING but alright. I'm actually a
little frightened at where my head is
gonna be if this falls through. This is
wellllllllllll past Up & Adam.
Whew.
Of course this all
could still happen. Nothing is over. But Josh
made it clear he'd be in contact throughout the time
he was in New York (from last Wednesday through this
whole week) and we're over a week now with nothing. No
response from an email is also tough because man - if
the fire's hot? If people are interested? If all
someone has to do is make one phone call? It's done.
You don't let it sit for a week. I mean we could
handle the loss of Weller-Grossman if 3 Arts was hot
on the project... but how can you say they are now?
It's just getting harder and harder for me to spin
this as a good thing. Shit is definitely on the rocks
right now and now instead of the other shoe falling?
I'm gonna be sitting here knowing that I made the
choice (a choice that I fucking agonized over) that
did this thing in. I was the fucking
shoe...
...or I'll get a
call from Josh at any moment and everything will be
back on - and 100x better and stronger than if I had
signed that contract.
