My relationship
with Columbus has changed quite a bit over the years.
I really do love this city and it will always
feel like mine. I can't imagine LA will
ever feel like that. An ownership where you just know
every street, every story, every piece of history and
everything seems "holdable". After living in
LA for 10 years Columbus feels like a play-city.
Nothing seems overwhelming after LA I guess. Even if
my career reached the stratosphere - you always know
that having this same feeling about Hollywood would be
fleeting. It's temporary. A baton that will be passed
to the next big thing very soon.
That was a strange
ramble.
It's very
interesting because the first time I came back to
Columbus after moving (only 5 months or so) made me
sick to my stomach. It was a time that Jess and I were
dangerously close to having to come back for good. So
seeing the road signs just hit me like a 2x4 to the
stomach. It all meant failure. It didn't mean that to
Jess. Heh. All seems rather fated now doesn't it? The
Journey really was always my internal struggle looking
back. She was supportive as hell - but always hoped
we'd go back. I wanted nothing of the sort, I had
unfinished business.
Now that
I actually see the path to success so clearly?
Columbus is just awesome for me. It's where all my
friends and family are. I could spend a month
here and see a different friend/family member each day
and laugh and reminisce. It's suddenly the most
comfortable place in the world to me. All because I
stayed in LA and really put the pieces together.
If everything completely falls apart with Comedy
Central in a couple months? Columbus won't feel like
this. I'll have that annoying itch to get back and
keep pushing. And there's the point of this
entry:
I felt this for
about 4 weeks with Up & Adam. It's the
greatest feeling I've ever known. It's called "being
nice to myself". Knowing I don't have to scheme and
"fight the fight" every waking second because I've
actually gotten to the level where other people are
taking the reigns and you actually have to be
patient. Nothing to scheme, nothing to invent, nothing
to do but relax and float downstream. I said I wanted
it, and man did I get it.
But you know what
I'm really excited about? Columbus press. Funny right?
Something I barely scratch when I lived here. The
Other Paper when I was at WTVN and The Lantern (OSU
college paper) for 4tvs. That's it. All the discs I
released, all the fans, all the radio shows... it was
as if no one knew what the hell to do with me. I
didn't belong in this city... but in a couple months?
They just may embrace me as much as I embrace them.
Or not. That last
article in '04 about the Seacrest Sign was pretty
shitty.
Ahh - back when
people didn't understand LOL was a descriptor not a
call to action.
But it really is
something I take personally. It's like finding
acceptance from your dad. If your hometown isn't
supportive of you... it kinda eats at ya. Then again,
the truth about showbusiness is that those who know
you best are oftentimes the least supportive. "You're
not special, I knew you in the 80s". LOL. Any aspiring
songwriter knows this all too well when they release a
CD and your friends get pissed that they don't get a
free copy. Complete strangers are happy to support
you, but your friends are offended. Join your Facebook
Group? What makes you special? Stop emailing me, we
went to high school together. So true. I think it's a
human thing though - the "other side" is always
greener. Meaning, that dude you've known your whole
life isn't uber-talented. How could he be? Ooooooh
that guy from the interesting city that I've
never been to... he's the shit. I'll support him. The
exoticness gets ya.
...yet you still
covet that support and acceptance. Nothing will feel
better to me than a news story on one of the local
news channels or something on the cover of the
Dispatch, etc. Or a huge show back in Columbus once
everything airs. That would honestly mean more than
selling out the Staples Center. Isn't that odd? I've
never really written about this, but I'm curious if
other people in my shoes feel the same
way.
And of course,
makin' dad proud. :-) It's not a mother/father thing -
I know my mother is proud of me as well, but since my
father was a performer my entire childhood (full-time
musician until just a few years ago) there will always
be that yearning to make him proud. I have,
that's not in doubt, but he will always be the first
phone call. He will always be the one person who knows
every second of my life in a way no one can, and with
an understanding only a fellow performer can have.
Very unique relationship we have for sure. Oooh ooooh
and now I can show you the videophone stuff from
overseas....
Just so freaking
cool. Of course he videotaped the calls. Hahaha. I
love how I've influenced my dad. Fatha even has his
own blog now. Love that shit.
RantsAndObservations.com
is mostly political stuff, but he's actually doing a
little series on me and what's coming up in the next
few months that has been very fun to read. Gotta be
kinda cool for Journey readers to check out come to
think of it. The similarities between us are pretty
endearing.
So tomorrow it all
ends. This little extension will finally expire and I
will take my final flights to get back to LA. What a
long, strange trip it's been. So glad I ended it in
Columbus.
Adam
ps - in all
seriousness - to anyone I missed please know that not
only did I not have very much time... I also
didn't have my cell phone. I didn't bring it overseas
because my razr doesn't have a sim card and it
wouldn't work - and I never intended on coming
back to Ohio. So it's been incredibly difficult to
arrange things last minute. I hope to come back in
September for my high school reunion - but with all
that's going on, that may get pushed to Christmas. No
matter what, I'm back here at the New Year to film
stuff for "From 1 to 1000" on the 10 year anniversary.
Whew.
