- 8:04 PM, Friday,
October 13th, 2023:
-
- So the theme for
the art/talent show thingee or whatever at Vienna's
school was "Hope" this year. You know, elementary
school shit like: "I hope we cure cancer." "I'm
hopeful we'll end climate change." Vienna writes a
poem about pigeons hoping people drop
pizza.
-
- <blink>
-
- Yes. Yes, Vienna.
That is exactly right. The judges may not appreciate
your absolute lack of hope in anything meaningful -
but goddamnit that's hilarious. That's the most
inadvertenly irreverent choice I've ever heard a 5th
grader make.
-
- So she was gonna
make a book of it... but looking at the poem
I said: "It'd be an awfully short book, but it'd
be a pretty cool cartoon." An idea which she
LOVED...
-
- ...until this poor
girl realizes just, how, much, work, car, fucking,
toons, are. But I handed her the ipad and she got
to work. She thought she was doin quite well. I helped
her break down her poem into each picture but the
kicker was? Every damn thing she ever drew,
I made her draw TWICE. So that shit wiggled.
I told her "listen, it's the fastest way to
create movement without actually animating
movement."
-
- So she drew, and
she drew. She cried. She didn't want to keep drawing
and I told her "You're welcome to just take what you
already have and make it a book." She didn't like
that. So she kept going. She drew and animated every
freaking frame of this as well as writing it and
voicing it. She did however use the infamous Guillaume
Tell: Overture instead of making the music because A)
you're allowed to and B) it's perfect. The funny thing
is Vienna thought it was cheating using music she
didn't also write. She's certainly my kid.
-
- So I present what
is the most VIENNA 2 minutes you'll ever see. It's so
hard to explain to people how goofy and fun this kid
is and I think she succesfully communicated
that...
-
-
- So this is one of
those things that they judge where if you get the top
award you go to city/regionals/state etc and I can see
this going one of two ways: it's so far past the "look
at the adorable hopeful kids, they're our future"
pieces they wanted so she may get a pat on the head
and this won't move on... or it wins everything.
I don't see a whole lot of in-between here. But
as I told Vienna, it really is off-theme and that
USUALLY isn't rewarded in these types of "contests".
As someone who has made cool shit that didn't fit a
theme (ahem, Trinitrons/Aspen 2001) I feel ya
hon. But she doesn't care at all. She LOVES it.
Like all that belaboring about how hard animating is?
The moment the voice over and music comes in you
forget that. She's so happy she didn't make a
book.
-
- ...but she'll
probably never make another cartoon. LOL
-
- Adam
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