- 9:33 PM, Tuesday,
September 5th, 2023:
-
-
-
- I mean it's a
helluva psychological study, really. Interesting I'm
surprised by my own reaction.
-
- So Billy got this
message from Thor:
-
- "Just talked to
*****, they have another call this week with business
development before he will commit. But still seems
promising. It's really about merchandising and
monetizing."
-
- So "There's your
money..." was a bit of a hope last week? I mean,
I was surprised when Thor said it because it
didn't seem as clear to me, but Thor works for the
NFL. Has for 7 years. So... you believe him. Reminds
me of Vinnie Favale at CBS. He's the VP of late night,
he wanted "Up & Adam", hell he named it... had to
believe him.
-
- Of course nothing
is a done deal, they could very well figure it out
this week or next. We have time until the 10/16 shoot
of course, but it does bring up the reason this was
even a big deal: there is no way to presently monetize
this... the NFL even supporting the format it is
THE ONLY WAY it would work. It's the instant
credibility to the format. So the money is actually
backwards... does that make sense? Everyone else needs
a structure to pay us to provide content. The NFL is
so big they can make their own rules. As I say in
the pitch, Meta would literally pay the NFL for the
right to HOST literally anything with that shield. Or,
the NFL could make their NFL+ app in VR and boom, it
hosts flat and VR180 content. All of that stuff takes
time however, and if they want that in place or are
trying to merchandise or monetize this in today's
landscape? It ain't happenin'. That was the
conversation we need to have. In fact me bringing up
that you could stream these files from NFL+ was news
to Thor. He was actually aggrivated it was never told
to him before the moment I said it. Guess why it
wasn't told to him:
NO ONE FUCKING TALKED TO ME.
-
- ...however if we
JUST DO THE TEST - I think the
result helps bring everything else together. The
content here is king. It's agonizing that they're all
trying to figure out the business side without even
one headset in that building. That's the motivator.
Shit, every once and awhile this year when I've been
down or felt defeated? I'd just watch the content. And
then I'd go... "Oh right... you're really onto
something." You need that shit almost weekly. You need
that push and as more of this goes out of my hands
(even having that message go to someone else is
bizarre) my body shuts down and moves on. However this
time it was indeed something else...
-
- So here's the
instant order of emotions after reading that
text:
-
- That's
bad...
-
- Thank GOD I
don't have to work with Billy, now.
- That's after the
line-item production fee life-saver. That's after some
great talks and finding some workable solution and
generally feeling positive when we hung out this
weekend. That was my gut-reaction to losing the NFL:
absolute relief. My soul knows I don't trust
Billy. And it's a competence thing. Like, he's looking
up videos on DeoVR and sending them to me like
research. Videos I've been watching all year, hell
I've spoken to the filmmakers. Like - we're the group.
We're the ones testing and attempting and shooting and
releasing. And in an effort to seem relevant he's just
watching and logging it down as research. I guess
I should be happy he's motivated, but it just
feels awful. Again, because he actively says he WANTS
to make these films and be involved in VR180. If he
was just doing business stuff and pitch decks for
meetings we'd be all good. But he wants to be a
filmmaker and is studying how fisheye lenses work and
asking me all these questions and again, it just feels
slimy. Like - dude: do the work. Just get a camera,
shoot some shit, and watch it in your headset. Learn
the fucking craft. I don't know how you can direct
without EVER DOING THAT. You know? Now once
you have done that, then sure - you can have a
knowledge base to direct. But until then? Uhm. It's
super-offensive to the people who have done the work.
It's like watching a bunch of YouTube DIYs and never
actually attempting any of it... but then teaching
that DIY class. It's a shortcut that hurts EVERYONE.
-
- But I don't
really know how to get out of this. My hope is if/when
the NFL thing doesn't go through he isn't able to
get any more pitches. I still keep doing my thing
(got a meeting with The Professor this week!!!) and
focus on New Zealand. But it's crazy right? That's my
HOPE. My head still says: "No, dude you want the
NFL" and of course I want that test - even if just for
my REEL! That's next-level access for SURE. But
looking past that, it's nothing but "ick".
I mean, I'm trying to regain the trust but there
never was trust in his business acumen. I don't know
it. In fact, it's all been negative. Even after
I got over the initial "we" bullshit, that next
week was awful. Poor communication, catching him
"massaging" the truth... just awful constantly. So
it's no wonder I felt some relief from the NFL
thing possibly falling through.
-
- ...and of course
as I say in the song it could very well just be
PTSD from the other shoe falling so often in my life.
I'm used to the pattern. Made my song, wrote my
thoughts and am already past it. That's the awesome
thing about The Journey... this is like record time.
If I get a message in the next couple weeks that
it's back on? Well holy shit. Like getting it all over
again.
-
- ...but the fact
that Thor read the money dude wrong on the pitch day
speaks volumes. That's a crack in the credibility
armor no matter what. As was not wanting to meet with
me or prepare the pitch other than looking at Billy's
pitch deck slides. I sympathize with Thor to a degree,
I know Billy acted like he was involved in this
and understood everything and we were partners... but
if I'm Thor? I don't care how long I've "known"
Billy... I meet with the actual person making the
content. The person actually in the field, producing
everything. Every step of the way this has felt
backwards...
-
- ...and I may get a
message (well, Billy will - I'm just the editor
apparently) that everything's good to go for the shoot
next month. But I'm absolutely not holding my breath.
I've been down this road and I'm gonna go breathe deep
over here for a bit.
-
- Ahh, The Journey.
The more things change...
-
- Adam
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