- 8:15 PM - August
- How do you start
an entry like this? Slowly, I guess.
- Feelings-wise -
the majority of me feels like this is already done.
Now that will pass. That will pass as logistics take
over and the realities set in. However... I know this
feeling and I had it in 1999. CD101 stopped me by
offering me a better on-air position and then within a
few days THAT was gone and the path was set: I was off
- This time the path
started on August 17th. Three entries ago watching my
kids start school in our make-shift corner of the
house. A seed of anger hit me. We were making lemonade
(I'm good at that) and doing all we could... but the
REASON started to really, really, really piss me off.
- Like, I should be
THE candidate for being pissed off about the
COVID response since my grandfather died from it
in April. He died alone, that's fucking awful.
However, after not living in the same state as the man
for over 20 years, the real pain there was being
empathetic towards my mother who had to deal with
everything. CeBe having to die alone on the other hand
is what really wrecked my psyche. Not that a dog is
worth more than a human, but for my personal emotional
state - I just wasn't in Ohio. Couldn't be in
- So I'm pretty much
in the "FUCK the people that let this happen" camp.
But I never got really angry? Until three entries ago.
My kids losing the end of their Kindergarten and 1st
grade years sucked. A whole lot. Them now losing the
ENTIRETY of their 1st and 2nd grade years is nearly
unforgiveable with something as
FUCKING EASY TO DEAL WITH as
a goddamned virus. The idea that they could also lose
more? 2nd and 3rd grade? Their entire elemntary school
years? Never leaving the house because the
administration has politicized a fucking vaccine to
the point where we don't know what's real anymore?
I've said all of this in that a few days ago... but
today? Today felt different.
- Because now we're
actually making the plans. Who will sell what
property... what the real estate market looks like in
Vancouver. The schools, the system. Talya, her mother
and I have been privately obsessing over those details
and then talking about it after. Kind of laughing at
how we've all found the same Facebook groups, etc.
Learning about how immigration works, the paths to get
there. Even downloading forms and starting the
- Today was the day
it felt real.
- Now, it isn't real
yet. I cannot say that enough. It isn't 1999, I'm
not 24, and I most assuredly do NOT want to move. I'm
angry. I'm angry this has even gotten to this point.
I'm angry Trump isn't down by 20 and I have to
type this. I'm angry that even if Biden gets in? This
run is already over. This virus couldn't be stopped
now no matter who is in charge. You want Biden so we
can go back to normalcy
FOR THE NEXT ONE. The hope that after 4
years of Trump we can rewrite our constitution so this
shit doesn't happen again. But the reality is,
propaganda and misinformation is SO unchecked? It may
not matter. Biden may absolutely win and next spring
we will still have to make the choice and move our
...OUT OF THE FUCKING COUNTRY...
- ...so we can have
a community that believes in science and being kind.
Honestly, a community that isn't being targetted by
cyber propaganda. Make no mistake, that's what's
happening. We're a target, and we're being targetted.
Canada ain't. Lots of countries are not targets of
this shit because they're just not big players. But
the US and parts of Europe? Are ABSOLUTELY targets.
Brexit wasn't organic, folks. Trump wasn't organic.
It's the result of targetted disinformation campaigns
that governments cannot figure out how to control.
While they all focus on privacy with social media, the
unregulated propaganda campaigns FLY BY. And here
- Again, I have
said this for years and I don't mean to repeat
myself but today, 8/22/20 felt different. So different
I had to say to Talya and Karen: "Try to
compartmentalize because if your heart is already in
Canada, we won't be able to make good decisions."
Partly saying that to myself as well.
- I will say
this - knowing we have an "out"? Helps. The stress of
2020 and all we're losing is HEAVY. Knowing we have an
exit strategy helps. It helps a lot. We are extremely
fortunate. We have money. We own property. We have
choices. We can do this. Not many people can say that.
So as our country falls apart, we can have our own
private tears for what we grew up believing in being
gone... but we can look ahead at starting a new
- It's with that I
show you today's video which is honestly, very stupid.
It has meaning for me because I shot it right after
the 3 of us we're talking SO seriously about
Vancouver. Where you could just feel the energy shift
and then the kids put on this "show" while we're all
still processing everything.
- And they're the
reason this is happening. Without kids? All of us
would be in the streets right now. We would be
fighting the good fight and trying to reshape the
future of our country. With kids this young however?
All that matters is they get a normal fucking life.
They get to GO TO FUCKING SCHOOL. They
get to have friends. They get to have birthday
parties. You know - LIFE.
- And 100 million of
you still won't vote. Man, fuck you all.