10:30 AM, Friday, May 5th, 2017:
Well, I think yesterday it became official. After two weeks of back and forths, I have no choice but to make this public. It isn't yet, probably won't be until next week, but as you'll see from the video there was no way else to do this other than shutting down the entire project and I simply can't afford to do that after all that's been put into it and will CONTINUE to be put into it. Here's everything that has transpired since that awful fucking day two weeks ago.
I wrote a long personal letter to Kenny that goes even deeper into issues that I probably won't even send let alone post it in a locked entry. Just this one incident is bad enough. I see no reason in bringing up every other way he railroaded me, but rest assured - if this becomes an actual fight/argument, the list is lonnnnnnnnnng. It shouldn't be however. This is pretttttttty black and white. Then again, I remember another modification that was prettttttty black and white that once public got disected into confusion. I won't let that happen. I have nothing more to say really. I have to move on. I have moved on as you'll see in the next entry and incredibly, we will be racing on Sunday.
This is deeply, deeply personal for me and the pain I feel for my father right now is so intense. As I've said to friends about this, it's the type of thing that had it happened after our father had passed I would've said to Kenny: "If dad knew about this it would've killed him." To see my father THAT proud, THAT excited for his sons to work together and then have this happen... I just wish he never had to see this side of Kenny. I mean, we all saw this side of Kenny as a kid, but both my father and Lonna had gotten to a good place with Kenny as an adult and they had a good working relationship. I totally believe in that shit, man. They found a comfort zone with each other and could at least keep in contact. I'm sure they still will! But I know their idea of him is just absolutely skewed. I really do hope that before they get too old, he can change. At 27, I'm not holding my breath. He's certainly old enough to not have done ANYTHING in that video.
So next week when this is finally public I can exhale. Having to hide/block/stop everything for so long has just killed me. Done covering up.