7:25 AM, Sunday, August 7th, 2016:
I wake up this morning without much direction that isn't completely in my head at this point. When I received the email from Collins Avenue, I responded immediately with a question and then the following day just "guess" edited the reel, sent it off and asked if it was what they needed. Over week later? Not a word. That's par for the course with Collins...
...what isn't par for the course however is not hearing back from Geeking Out who was supposed to shoot last week, then let me know things were kind of all over the place and they'd get back to me. I will write them tomorrow, but I know this business well enough that you know well before the week of if you're doing a location shoot. So suddenly this 10-day construction binge was not only unnecessary, but maybe? They ain't comin'. I know that sounds like a bit of a leap considering a minor delay, but they were waiting back on network apporval and if that doesn't come in a timely matter? Something else fills the void. If they want it, they're on it. If they're "iffy" it lingers until something better comes along. And if Greg isn't pushing for it? There's always something better. For fuck's sake they had Matt Damon on episode one and JJ Abrams coming up on the 2nd show. Yeah, GolfKon isn't exactly front burner. But, I'll email tomorrow, he's been good at responding and we'll go from there.
What has indeed been constant (although still in my head) is my push to stay in the 150s. I didn't do a big "150!" entry because, well, I did that before. A couple times. No, that's no longer newsworthy to me. Ya know what is? 100 straight days in the 150s. That, my friends, is something I don't believe I've ever achieved. That means a bunch to me. That means I may have mastered a way to keep only a 7-8 pound fluctuation for a long stretch of time. It took me finally accepting my cave man ways and taking it as far as I could...
Cave man. Ya know, that period of time where the strong had to go days without food and once they killed their food? EATING THE FUCK OUT OF IT. Eating so much that it could last you several days. I think quite a few of us still have those genes and with as plentiful as food is, our instinct is still to eat several days worth. And I mean several days worth. I can live off 1200 calories a day if I'm careful but I can easily eat 5000 calories in a day. EASY. I can do 2-3000 calories in a SITTING without being in any real pain...
...and I can also go 24-36 hours without a bite and be fine. Now, I don't like it. It's not fun. But I can do it and still keep working, keep moving, keep going. I remember figuring this out when I had done a water fast and the next morning I got up and ran 2 miles before I got kinda tired. And then I realized - oh shit no FUCK I'm tired, I haven't eaten in 37 hours. What the shit was I thinking? Well, I wasn't. My body can just do that.
Now, 1200 calories a day sucks. Especially in the maintaining phase. When you're losing? There's motivation. When you're just trying to not go back? It's boring. So I started just testing. I said to myself: ANY weight in the 150s makes me happy. Sure I'd love to be 151, but 158 is fine. The difference in how I look/feel is quite minimal between those two weights. My underwear model days are numbered at 158, but since I'm NOT AN UNDERWEAR MODEL, I have no actual NEED to be 151. But I always get to 150, stay for about 3 weeks and inevitably jump to 165 and within a few months I'm at 180. That's where my body wants to be. So how do I (not you or anyone else - this isn't not advice), how do I stay in the 150s and stay sane? I found two ways:
I eat whatever the fuck I want one day, and then fast the next. I don't do this everyday, but once or maybe twice a week. The other days I do my normal 1200. For the first 2 months of being in the 150s? I did this with GREAT success. I couldn't believe it. It felt like I was cheating. I was eating 3000 calories, sometimes mostly in one sitting! Then I took a day off food... and it worked. No, I wasn't 150, but routinely 155-157. It was an awesome way to deal with all the shit that comes up in life. Big events, huge dinners - I got to enjoy all of that and as long as I countered the next day with a fast? Was fine.
However, I wasn't doing a ton of strenuous activity. I would run at the beginning of the fast day (man, carb-loading WORKS! Some of my best times ever after eating a ton the night before), but the rest of the time I was just doing computer work. Of course lately I've had to be in construction mode and suddenly, that shit wasn't gonna fly. So although I couldn't completely fast, what I did attempt (and it's still been working) is putting a good 18 hours between meals from the night before to breaking the fast around 3-4pm. Since we get up 6-7am, trying to get to 3-4pm is a fucking hard feat... but one I can do if I keep my mind on other things. Then I pretty much ravage a couple thousand calories and repeat the process again. Averaging around 157 at that routine. Of course that's the other thing: I'm not 150. I can't eat that many calories and stay 150, but I can stay in the upper 150s.
So it's a give and take and no matter what I'm on that scale and if I get too close, I work hard to get back under 155. But man, 100 straight days. I really feel like I've taken my personal strengths in how my body works and applied them in a positive direction. I am an overeater. It's in my genes. And while, yes, I can focus all my energy and beat it and only eat 1200 calories a day for months at a time? It's extremely taxing on my noggin' and unsustainable forever. But, I will always have the ability to fast. Always. I have figured that out about me. And again, don't get me wrong - it's not easy. I get the headaches at first, etc. But whereas some people would PASS OUT if they even attempted it? I don't. I just wait out some of the hard times when doing it and in about 5-10 minutes I make it through. And yes, I do have coffee. Duh. We don't sleep. I average about 3-4 hours of sleep per night (so much on my mind and, uhm, kids). Caffeine absolutely curbs your appetite.
So I guess I'll check in in another 100 days and see if I'm still doing well. I think that's around Thanksgiving - LMAO. If I'm still in the 150s then, I'll be pretty amped.
Anyway, clearly the video will be the construction binge I've been on the past 10 days. Should have the tower complete mid-week and then who knows what happens next. Part of me is certainly preparing for all of it to disappear (Chasing Heroes & Geeking Out), but I'll have a better course because of it.
Goddamn this journey sometimes, man.
Whew. I sure to get shit done.