- 5:26 PM,
Wednesday, June 10th, 2015:
- The amount of
things I've done construction-wise is actually pretty
intense. Things I actually can't even put in
print because of the legality of it, but suffice to
say - I'm very good at problem solving and making
things work. In a sense GolfKon is a testament to that
but really, it's all pretty simple - just the scope of
attempting it that's crazy. This gopher however has
become an absolute mind-fuck. How can something so
simple be so difficult? Well, let me
- I figured I'd
just take apart a whack a mole device and voila, a
gopher will pop his head in and out of a hole by the
tee at 6 and mess with your rhythm. Yay. Bought the
legit Caddyshack Gopher on ebay and it was a bit
bigger than I thought it would be. Spent a day
taking it apart, wanted to try and keep some of the
gopher's dance moves while he popped up, but alas,
getting electricity to that would require too much and
I'm not sure many people would notice it.
- Now, not a lot of
whack-a-mole options on ebay but tons of people trying
to make one. In the end I figured just get a spinning
motor and make a little piston system in a pipe and
it'll go up and down. Found that what I needed
was a "Servo" motor and OFF to a hobby shop I went!
Got the little motor, went to Fry's to get the little
power transformer and voila! Nothing!I could KIND
of get it to work, but it wasn't smooth and sadly, the
servo motor was just too tiny. I needed it to
take SOME abuse from feet and toddlers, and this
wasn't happening. Nor would it be able to lift the
gopher with all the piston stuff I had to put around
it, etc. A big thank you to Robin's Hobby Shop in
Glendale for actually giving me my money back when
Fry's transformers ruined their motor. $20 jobbies and
they replaced it immediately. Good guy, that Robin.
- So I went to an
actual motor place. Found a strong enough motor, about
$90... except? the lowest RPM was like 100 and it's
just too fast. They were motors used for fans and
there has to be a bit of a slow rhythm or it turns
into a complete luck shot. I can't fuck with the par #
on Hole 6, it's already ridiculous, it needs to be a
slight wrinkle, but nothing that takes the skill away.
So the motors with enough torque to lift the gopher
were too fast, and the motors that went the right
speed were just not powerful enough.
- Next idea? Screw
driver! I'd zip tie an electric screw driver and
voila! But guess what, you can't really select a speed
even if you take it apart. It changes with every
weight. Basically, if I had it set up and someone
touched it? It would STOP. Any tighter on the zip tie?
Gopher went APESHIT. I mean SPAZZY fast. It was at
this point Joel let me know he and Brian couldn't make
the Memorial so I put it aside for this tournament
focusing on the 4th of July. Which actually works
better because that tournament always ends on Hole 6.
- I started
calling everyone. One guy had me convinced
I needed a pneumatic operation under the course
as that's how the "big boys" did it. And I'm
like, mother-fucker I need something to simply
SPIN at a slow rate. I don't need Disneyland. FUCK.
Half the motor places in the city had no idea what to
tell me. They kept passing me to managers that only
understood the products they had, with no way of
applying them to different things. Finally a guy said,
tell me the weight you need to lift and the
RPM you want. I told him, and he said he could
give me someting close for only $800.
THIS CAN'T BE. Come on. I'm hand-making the
whole piston apparatus and housing, I just need a
goddamn motor THAT SPINS.
- I remembered
a guy at a gig mentioning windshield wiper motors. I
initially wrote it off because the back and forth
motion would be kinda difficult to give a whole lot of
movement without a REALLy big apparatus (all of which
has to go under layers and layers of concrete already
there). But I had no choice. I ordered a
winsdhield wiper motor from a chevy truck on Amazon
and the reviews showed people absolutely using it for
strange things like halloween props that move, etc.
Some dude even gave all the electric pin-hole layouts
for everyone. Sweet.
- So I get it, plug
it in and wouldn't you know? IT JUST SPINS!
OH MY FREAKING GOD. There are two
speeds, fast and slow and the slow speed is
perrrrrrrrrrrfect. I ran off to home depot for some
pipes, rigged a little piston system together...
screwed it to a piece of wood...
There it is! And that motor cost $25! Ha! Granted I've
spent close to $200 simply buying and rebuying shit
after I ripped it up. But I now know what
I need to pull this off and I even bought an
extra motor!. There will be something else moving at
some point, and now I don't have to do
THIS shit again.
- Of course comes
water-proofing it and the hardest part, lowering that
ENTIRE thing below the greens. The greens are
actually concrete boxes ON TOP OF a concret
driveway. So you get through a roughly 8 inch layer of
concrete and then there's the driveway. That's another
4 inches but now? You can't swing a sledgehammer nor
have room for a jackhammer because of the rest of the
course. So you use a chisel and hammer. Little,
by little, by little. So really, the hole construction
has just BEGUN, but the part that has had me stumped
for 2 months is finally complete. A windshield wiper
motor from a Chevy Truck. Of course.
- I do dig