5
 
 
 
12:20 PM, Saturday, July 19th, 2014:
 
I've been lucky to have some really cool moments in my career, but for one reason or another - they always feel a bit tainted by something. Basically because there was always an equal and opposite reaction to, say, getting your own late-night show opposite Carson Daly on CBS. Ahem, it went away.
 
But there's a handful of moments that can never be taken away and no one could really "purchase". I hung out with, talked to and made a documentary of Michael Jordan. I was on a Sopranos episode at the Bada Bing and hung out with Gandolfini. I was in the green-room with Ringo Starr listening to him talk about funny Seinfeld episodes. I watched Obama become our president with my own eyes... and yesterday I hung out with Weird Al Yankovic and he gave me ideas for a UHF minigolf hole for GolfKon.
 
 
HOW THE SHIT?
 
So Mo'Kelley lands a killer in-studio interview with Weird Al to promote his new album "Mandatory Fun". It took me all of 2 seconds to ask Mo if I could videotape for him to which he replied "OF COURSE!" And only later did we realize his management wouldn't allow video of the interview. Doh. But Mo still let me come down and be a fly on the wall. Phone interviews are easy to get... in-studios? That's tough. So props to Mo for pulling this off. Super happy for him.
 
Now anyone who knew my radio career, knows parodies were a huge part of what I did. From comedy routines to voices to actual debate - they were always interspersed with parodies. Weird Al was a painfully big (to my mother who heard his music constantly) inspiration to me and I loved the challenge of a good parody. I of course ended up being far more political and dirty for that matter... for no other reason that I just did what was in my heart. It was never going to be a career (like anyone could supplant Weird Al) it was just something I did and was good at. I released a Parody CD in 2000 called "Star Wars Blew". 20 tracks from my CD101 days. Still listen to it from time to time.
 
So in preperation Saturday night I throw on UHF to show Talya as it's such a time capsule of the 80s and has some really classic moments. Fans of it know it by heart and it's almost like a "club" when you know it. It then occurs to me... UHF hole. Weird Al is "nerdy" enough to think a backyard mini-golf course is cool and him there dedicating a hole? Wow. Would be awesome for the course and for the charity attached to the hole.
 
Of course, this is Mo's baby and I had no problem just meeting Al and then contacting his management after so as to not step on Mo's toes at all. Mo's toes. Heh. I figured I'd play it by ear...
 
I get there a little early and there's a little spring in everyone's step. It's kinda cute. We're all kinda nerdy and it's just one of those guys that is a big deal and has been our entire lives. Seriously, Michael Jordan, The Beatles, Tony Soprano, Obama... it's in that category for me. If John Ritter were still alive he'd be up there too. Massively influential people to me. Then, Al arrives early but gets lost and Mo and his producer are too busy to go help.
 
I got this.
 
So I run down with another intern and suddenly I'm the one running Al and his manager Jay to their parking spot in the garage and walking them, by myself to the station. "Hi, I'm Adam, I'm a friend of Mo's" "Hi, I'm Al, this is my manager Jay."
 
Surreal.
 
So Al is on his twitter feed scrolling through comments of his latest video (he released 8 in 8 days, this was #7) and I was professional throughout - walking them into the building where the other intern joined us and we took them to the studio. I then ended up sitting in the studio for nearly an hour and a half and just smiled ear to ear watching Mo. There honestly wasn't a hint of jealousy even though I spent so much time in talk radio and would've killed for the opportunity then. The reason? Mo earned the fuck out of this moment and I relate to what he's been through. When he succeeds I feel nothing but outright joy for him. When good guys win, we all win. I will help him in any way that I can... forever. 'Cause that's just what radio guys do. We all get it. I know what it's like to work for a big company and all the politics and doubters and he's doing it. He's also a TOTAL GEEK that was as excited as I was and again, just smiled from ear to ear. Happy to see him kickin' ass.
 
During the breaks I actually got to talk to Al a bit while Mo was dealing with stuff. It was really cool. I mentioned to him that it must be "Anxiety Week" for him since he actually reads the twitter comments and he's releasing a new song/video every freaking DAY. He agreed. He said it's the weekdays that are the hardest because usually he can relax... but it has been like a firehose of comments. To which, of course I had to, I yelled FIREHOSE in his face which made him giggle. I'm not sure people realize the vulnerability of what he's doing. All artists are concerned with how they're received to a degree and rarely is there a situation where you direct that feedback to one piece of art for an entire 24 hour period and then repeat that 7 more times. It's why they release videos/singles every 3 months or so. This is chaos. And pretty brilliant honestly - because the swell built to such a crescendo during these 8 days that he may just have the #1 album on Billboard next week. His first.
 
The interview went great, Mo was flying. The breaks however were we kind of let loose. Al was on Fox Business the other day and basically got grilled as if he was holding back where the money comes from for these videos. The guy at Fox business literally didn't understand how the internet worked. (The sites paid for the production of the videos for the right to house the content and get ad revenue and Al got free videos to push album sales) He mentioned he was going on Fox & Friends the following morning and I said "So you can explain to them how the internet works?" Al starts giggling and Mo chimes in about the idiocy of Fox Business not getting that. Weird Al holds his politics close to the vest but you could see his face and it was clear he was as bemused as all of us.
 
Also, at every break 2-3 people are coming in for pics and it's making their fucking lives. It's awesome to watch. They end up staying a segment past 7 and when the interview is over everyone comes in for final pics and I grabbed some iphone footage of the free-for-all.
 
 
I then walk them back to the car and in the elevator I bring up GolfKon. "Actually, Jay you'd be the guy to talk to about this... I built a minigolf course in my backyard and I hold charity events"
 
Al:  "LET'S GO!"
 
I bring up dedicating a hole to UHF (which Jay actually directed) and Al mentions that he was really into mini-golf when he was younger. As I'm explaining it he says:  "How big is your backyard?!?!" to which I explained it was a "normal, valley sized backyard, just strategically placed holes." I ask them both if they have any actual screen-used props that could be made part of the course and Al said he had absolutely nothing. Old movie posters is about as good as he could guess. At which point Jay says - make something new! And then Al and Jay start riffing on the best way to incorporate it and Al emphatically says - "Spatula Windmill", which, of course is what you do. If you've seen the movie you're thinking "DUH - PERFECT". Jay says "you have my full blessing" and I said I'd love for them to be involved if we can work out their schedules and that I would be in touch with Jay when I finish the piece and we'll go from there.
 
<blink>
 
Of course there is one actual issue here, I freaking hate windmills on minigolf courses. It's the one thing everyone expects and it's counter to everything GolfKon aspires to which is a nearly "hidden" course that requires more skill than luck. Not that windmills are all luck, but the shots are already hard enough and now I'm gonna change one (or several since some tees share holes) that drasticaly? Also it requires electricity, I have a toddler (soon to be two of 'em) and two dogs that would love nothing more to destroy that. And the final issue? Everything about UHF is tacky as fuck. That's the brilliance of it. But this is still my backyard and throughout everything? It still maintains a pretty professional look with nothing too busy. The closest "push" of that rule is the Golf to the Future courthouse but I matched the color schemes and it blends very well. A spatula windmill or a wheel of fish is gonna be hard to say the same about. LMAO.
 
And thennnnnnnnnn it hit me. I've been saying for awhile now I wanted to create a random number generator somewhere on the course for tie-breakers. Be it a classic "wheel" or like the price is right wheel, where you spin numbers 1-9 to see which hole you START the tie-breaker on. I hate that we always start at 9 and think it would be fun if it was random.
 
ENTER the Spatula Wheel of Fish that will be on the back wall of the guesthouse so it's out of your initial sight, but for the video shot will look as prominent as anything else. I can make it as gaudy as possible, incorporate 2 gags and I may even be able to find a way to have a FIREHOSE in the center in case you land on the wrong "spatula" during your spin.
 
This will however, probably be the most expensive change to the course (not counting the freaking TIME MACHINE) but I have a feeling if we attatch a good charity to it and the wheel is authentic enough?  I can probably pull off a mini-UHF reunion. Now, clearly, this will not be in conjunction with one of our already planned events (ala Memorial Day) because if I thought that day was hectic - this would shut down our street. This will have to be a private dedication with a few select people just for the video to help out the charity. I mean, unless Al wants the news there - who knows, but even then - this would be almost impossible to stage in my backyard with any modicum of safety.
 
But first things first, let's get that wheel done and working and see what Jay thinks. Al is local so we could pull this off really fast and could find a creative way to raise a ton of money.
 
And Mo? I owe ya brother. Happy as hell for your continued success.
 
Adam