2:07 PM, Wednesday, October 16th, 2013:
Well this could be short-lived. Hmmm...
Back in August I happened upon an article on Vice about some poor fucker who had to intern for Pauly Shore at The Comedy Store. Having my own frustrating history with that place I felt for him, but the comment section (notoriously fucked on vice.com) was brutal. I genuinely felt for him and read another article where he interviews 4 girls who won't date him. He's admittedly "the chubby kid from Project X" and he has the balls to ask out models and then when rejected, document it and publically flog himself further? Shit man, this is my kind of dude. I friended him on Facebook and messaged: "don't listen to the haters... the comedy store is a fucked up place. oh and sweet jesus you picked some hot girls to get rejected by - lol"
He added me and we began talking. I explained that I had kind of dropped out of the race to start a family and build a golf course to which he replied upon seeing GolfKon.com "whoa. cool. you built the whole course by yourself? That's a cool Vice piece. I'll hit you up next week."
Wow. I was stunned. Not sure if any of you have stumbled onto vice, but it's very, well... adult. Edgy. This dude (JB) and another writer went to Corey Feldman's birthday party (kinda NSFW) as a piece. Vice is usually not minigolf in your backyard, but he was impressed and wanted to come to the Halloween Tourney for the piece. I explained to him that this would not be a "slutty halloween" party (though Talya is toying with being a knocked up Hooters girl - LMAO), but he said the whole point of the story is that someone would even BUILD a minigolf course in his backyard. Can't argue with that. It is bizarre.
What this really meant however was that I would FINALLY have something to link charities and businesses to for credibility. I cannot begin to tell you how hard it is to convince people this is real. With this article? The videos? The site? Now 2014 will be set-up to make a LOT of money for charity. As I've always said, I'm doing these events for free no matter what 'cause I'm a dork and my kids will dig it - so why not raise money for something? Get businesses to sponsor holes and give every single penny away. With this article, that will now be possible.
In the meantime we shot the shit every now and then and a couple weeks ago he put up a status seeing how many people would be interested in a Writer's Group. And there's my vice: opportunities. Though I'm "out of the game" for the time being with a baby a matter of weeks away and all the chaos that the beginning of 2014 will hold... I do wish to talk to other artists and produce some stuff and open my avenues a bit. It was also at a time when I could do it, but rather far. But I really wanted to get out and hopefully make some connections to produce some cool stuff. So last night, I went...
Just, wow. Just sitting and listening to what other writers go through was unbelievably eye-opening to me. I have always lived in a vacuum. Even at CBS? I couldn't get one bit of feedback from my peers or higher-ups (which I was told meant it was great, you only hear when it isn't) and I created entirely in my own brain. Rarely do I care about YouTube feedback unless it's actually a form of miscommunication and as I felt the neurosis of everyone I realized I was indeed lucky to be so much older. 'Cause my neurosis has faded substantially.
I also learned that by simply DOING The Journey for so many years (averaging 8 entries a month since ethe 90s) I've learned to write and let go with no issue. Even with songs, I accept they're not perfect and I get things done at a blazing speed. Like, tomorrow we're going to Disneyland and I will have the entirety of the footage loaded, edited down to a raw cut - and then the Journey cut, uploaded and shared by the next day. I am extremely in touch with the process of creating and editing what you create. I create the same way for The Journey as I did at CBS for a bunch of money with impossible deadlines (I do however miss that money and those deadlines - lol). It was an eye opening experience.
As far as continuing, I'm just not certain where I fit. They all seem to have actual reasons to do what they're doing (i.e. they earn a living) and I most decidedly do not. So whereas they're talking about holding each other accountable to deadlines they already have? I'm looking for new avenues in which to MAKE deadlines. And truth be told, JB knows damn well that he needed his own accountability and made this group up to provide that, which I have to admit is kinda brilliant. He's honest about it... and really everything he writes so I'm excited to keep going and see what I can get into. I'm also easily 15 years older than the majority of the group and it's very nice to be around the lack of harsh experiences. I would love to have dinner with 2000 Adam. It's indeed infectuous...
...of course I start this with realizing this may be short-lived. Heh. Well, that's because he wanted us to submit a piece to the group that we'd talk about next week and I figured I'd grab a 1000 word essay I wrote a couple years back for this site: Positively Annoying. In reality it was the monoluge to the following video, but it reads just as well:
And it occurs to me that, wow, I said "Fuck" a whole lot and I slam a group of people who are probably present in the group. But the truth is? I said FUCK a whole lot because it honestly annoys me so FUCKING much I can barely stand it. And I'm tired of being polite. If you can't see the self-help loop (unless you're under 20) I have no time to argue it. But I'm going to come off brash and old with pieces like that and how can I help it? I'M BRASH AND OLD. I'm so much older than my age it scares the shit out of me. I look in the mirror and see someone in their 30s and I giggle. I feel and in most respects am 60+. The lives I've lived? Uggggh.
But, that's not getting me ANYwhere. LOL. So, it would serve me well to shut the fuck up, feel a bit of the youthful exuberance and just maybe make a few friends. Time will tell.