5 years ago today,
a phone call changed my entire life. I have since
called it "The call that made The Journey" and it's
absolutely true. Without this moment, The Journey
would not be a roller coaster, as there would be no
movement. This started the first legitimate high, the
break at CBS, lead to all sorts of insanity. Without
it there'd be no Price is Right bit, Young & The
Restless bit, no Comedy Central pilot and certainly no
documentary now. Yes, it sucks where I am 5 years
later, but it's call like this that remind you that it
comes racing back at any moment. Hanging in there is
90% of the game. That I can do...
...what
I can't do, is play the trumpet. Well, I can at
least make sound, and in this video you will see for
tiny moments I do make what could be considered
musical noise. But the smooth "flow" of notes that Jon
spits out ain't happenin'. At least not in my first 2
minutes of picking up a trumpet. :-)
What I love
about this video is that it shows overwhelmingly, that
I'm sincerely shocked that I can't just be good at
something because I want to be. Talya even
replies to my "Wow, this is HARD" as if to say:
"DUH." I'm just undeterred. I'm freaking
horrible... but I believe that I'm gonna
get it at the next moment - and that isn't gone even
now. If there was a trumpet in here? I'd think in my
head: "OK, I can vibrate my lips at a nice even tempo,
I'm gonna knock out a few notes." I just have
this undying belief that I can accomplish anything.
What's missing lately of course is my obsession to
make it so.
It's the trait
that most defines me, so I like poking fun at it. I do
actually believe I can do anything if I
just try hard enough. And I've proven that belief
right in enough areas that I keep trying. It's why
I do believe I will eventually die doing
something remarkably stupid. Move that piano with
nothing but myself and a dolly? I can totally do
that...
...but actually
have, like 5 times. It's fucking remarkably stupid,
but my piano is fine and so am I. The one thing that
will probably stop this shit? Having a kid.
Hell, even being engaged makes me second guess things
a bit more. I would never want to hurt Talya, and
dying would most definitely hurt her. Man, what a
difference a year makes, huh? The isolation
I felt last year is stunning. I was so far
removed from people that cared about me, that I could
barely see outside of myself while in my depression.
Hmmm. Anyway...
So Jon needed to
rent out a guesthouse because the whole "practicing
your trumpet" thing was not going over too well where
he was before. I told him that it wasn't a big deal to
me or Talya, and truthfully - from that far away? We
can BARELY hear him. We'd have to mute the TV or stop
a fan and actually listen intently to catch it. Oh,
that and he's really fucking good and it's nice to
actually hear it. For the video however he just wanted
to know how loud it was outside his house so he let me
destroy that thing for a moment. As you can see my big
misunderstanding was I thought you had to do the
crazy-ass elephant noise, and really once you get your
muscles in shape, it's a far smaller push. You just
need the strength to keep your compression steady and
the know-how to move it accordingly.
It's fun to have a
fellow musician in the house again. As I mentioned
last entry 4 out of the 5 people who have stayed their
were musical, but really only Keith and I ever
did anything together (the Fiona Apple song I posted
in the Mike Nesmith entry). It was fun riffin to
Talya's song, "I Believe" with him at the end of the
video. Not exactly sure how/when we'd ever put
something together... but I appreciate musicians
'cause our brains work similarly. Like a shared
language. Fun energy to have around the
house...
...as is
ANOTHER puppy? Jesus. Not even here a week and
Jon is like, dude, I have to have a puppy. Poor
bastard has no idea what he's in for. LOL. Tiny
lab/german shepherd mix named Walter. He's staying
mostly in the guest house, but CeBe and LeeLoo are
enjoying following around the ball of fluff. Pictures
forthcoming. This is certainly a fun environment for
dogs with the fenced in backyard and access to the
kitchen through a doggy-door when it's
hot.
Alright... Must.
Go. Work on the festival edit of The Journey.
Ugh.
