7:03 AM, Sunday, January 23rd, 2011:
Can't sleep. 1000 things on my mind. Funny what suddenly caring about your life can do for ya. Sounds like a "Randoms" entry to me.
1) Rewriting History
Ugh. Not that I expect any of my friends to do this, but if you want to fuck with my brain? Come up with a drastically different view of our relationship and email it to me. Then respond with a smartass smiley. How did I go so many years without this? How fortunate was I that my relationships early in life were so strong? Such level-headed, good people? This is someone I cut-off last month but who emailed me randomly a few days ago and I was stupid enough to respond. Thinking a loving, communicative address of our relationship would somehow make sense to her NOW. See, I know that "rationale can hit a home-run, but irrationale can change the sport" - except I have a hard time believing this person is irrational. She's not as obvious as Donna. Of course writing back left myself open for even more slams at my character and integrity -and now I'm just... God I'm antsy. I'm angry. But why? The woman has never listened to reason... in over TWO YEARS. Why on earth am I surprised? 'Cause I love her and care desperately about my role in her life. <throws hands up> It doesn't matter that she doesn't act like a friend, that she's mean and hurtful - for some reason I feel the need to explain myself to her over and over. I guess it's the LIBRA in me (haaaaaaaaa) that goes crazy over imbalances. I see an obvious untruth and want to correct it. I can't. Maddening.
2) Thank you, juxtaposition
I know it's 'cause we're both in that stage of the relationship where we could literally club baby seals together and we'd still be in love, but it sure is nice to be able to talk about that first random with Talya and have her actually listen and understand. That I can have past relationships (clearly something someone with me would have to be cool with - ha) and have them still affect me today. So many women would not be cool with that. At all. If it affects you today, it must mean you're still in love or still hung up on them. For someone like me - that simply isn't true. There are several women in my life that I care about that if they turned on me, it would hurt me greatly. Relationships I've put 10+ years into and have shared so much. It's that ability to care that explains why I have such long lasting ties, and these are certainly tests for the person I'm romantically involved with. Flying colors for her, of course, but more than that? A reminder of what a complete lack of drama looks like. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
3) The all-time Grudge Match
Unlike the drama that will unfold today for me and Marty. We have never been this close in our entire lives. His favorite team, The Steelers, and my favorite team, The Bears - are both one win away from meeting in the superbowl. Five years ago we were close and The Steelers actually did make it, but The Bears absolutely blew it by losing their first playoff game. We REALLY thought it was gonna happen that year, so much that Marty didn't even want to talk about today for fear of jinxing it. But alas, the day is upon us. Of course if this actually happens? I don't know what we're gonna do. It seems nearly criminal to not watch this game together and make a short-film out of it. Our whole lives man. Whew. And to Greg, who doesn't understand why people care about sports: it's because it's fun. It's not war. It's a goddamn game. It's fun to root for a game. Real-life is a bit too intense sometimes. ;-)
4) Surreal timing
Speaking of whole lives... I think Mr. Moose has actually found his better half. In an absolutely eerie few weeks we've found ourselves going from single to "in a relationship" by random phonecalls of shock and amazement to each other. Both of us were in the thick of singledom when it just sort of snuck up on us. And now WE'RE finishing each others' sentences like an old married couple. It's pretty awesome. I am incredibly happy for him and it's actually really fun talking to him again 'cause we both know exactly what the other person is going through. However we will hate each other for two weeks starting at 10pm EST if our teams can pull this off. <Gulp>
5) Michael Vick couldn't...
HA. I know animal lovers were cheering when he threw THAT interception a couple weeks ago. (sigh) I sigh because I think this whole thing is crazy and as an animal lover I have to share my two cents on this and as usual, it will come from logic more than heart - which (contrary to this romantacized website) is how I tend to live my life. Much in the same way a pedophile who gets out of prison can never win? Neither can an animal abuser. To some people, there is no proper punishment. I tend to agree with that... to a point. And that point is, once the dude does his time and is free. At which point, I root for them to be successful again. It's why part of me actually has a problem with Megan's Law. Now, some areas have such fucked up laws when it comes to abusing children, I understand the need for Megan's Law - but it seems out-of-whack in my head. If you make it impossible for someone to be part of society again, you might as well keep them in jail. And sorry, as a parent - EVERYONE should be considered a stranger/child molestor so the point of the big Scarlet Letter is meaningless... but, I understand. Only part of me has a problem with the law, the other part thinks they should have their nuts chopped off. And same goes with Michael Vick. I'm not sure those that immediately defend him know just how cruel he was. Just how intense the abuse was. It wasn't just the dogfighting. That can be understood considering the south and the customs of the area. How they put dogs down (google it, not repeating it here) or even threw family pets in for laughs? So fucking heinous I think he should be shot. This ain't like huntin'. This is some sadistic shit. That all being said? Now that my heart has said it's peace? The man paid his due more than any single human being has EVER paid for this crime. At the height of his athletic career he threw away 2-3 years. He went to jail, he lost millions, he brought more light on the issue than has EVER been on it. The HUMANE SOCIETY has even written recommendations for how good he has been for this issue with his speeches (ironic, I know). He did everything asked of him and then some. At some point? Ya gotta let go. I think he's a fuckin' moron for saying he believes he should be able to own a dog now, but he deserves to pursue happiness as we all do. That's the law of the land. If you take issue with that? Fight the law, not the man who paid, again, more than any person has ever paid for this crime.
6) Crime pays about $3 Million an episode
Destroy your hotel room with pornstars and hookers and make more money than anyone for phoning it in. That is the life of Charlie Sheen, and I got to watch it first hand last week as I went to a taping of "Two and a half men" with Talya and her parents. It was the first taping after that story where producers were concerned if he would even show up and although tapings of sitcoms are excrutiating to sit through - I was all sorts of curious to see Sheen after all the hub-bub. It was as expected. <shakes head> I don't want to bemoan sit-com acting, as I enjoyed it with The Egos, but there comes a point in every sit-com where it's such auto-pilot that seeing it live actually angers a real actor. I mean, I'm happy for Jon Cryer (who will always be "Duckie" to me) for the money/fame he got, but I have to think he's ready to do something else. I mean, the pizza guy stole the show in this particular episode simply because we're all just tired of the other characters. However I do love how hard the 4th wall comes crashing down in the show. So many lines about hookers and Charlie made the audience laugh waaaaaaaaay too long. It all seems so scripted. People are really wondering if CBS is upset with Charlie's antics? Are you kidding? It writes the show. I honestly think it's all a publicity stunt. Like, that shit didn't even happen - and they paid some reporters to make up the story to make the show funnier. <shrugs> Interesting circus to watch.
7) Speaking of interesting to watch...
One more random from the night... So 90% of what you are watching during a taping is the warm-up guy bringing up audience members and making them do stupid shit for autographs and candy. It's amusing, if not a bit too predictable. "Let's find the hot chick and make her dance" is what it ends up being. Dirty old man as an emcee... check. He brings up one particular girl with a "special talent" and she is able to stick out her tongue and touch her nose. However, this woman elicited a "JESUS" even from me 'cause when she stuck out her tongue it seemed MILES too long. Which of course made the emcee turn her TOWARDS the crew and guess who came-a-runnin' to see this. Like, out of nowhere, here comes Charlie to soak in this woman now sticking her tongue out and putting a MINT up her nose with relative ease. Very funny to watch him watch her. I wonder if he pulled a rockstar move and got her backstage after? And why does that seem more sleazy than a rockstar doing it? <shrugs>
8) Speaking of sleazy...
Oh I fell for it too. The Golden-Voiced Homeless Man. How could you not be amazed at that video? And my hometown to boot? Wow. That's even the intersection I use in the Journey Documentary to re-enact the day Jess and I left. Bizarre. Anyway, if you watch the entire video he talks about drugs/alcohol and a tiny little flag went off in my head (and many others) "Oh, there's a fuckload more to THIS story." This is where the republican in me comes out from time to time. They ain't all just "Down on their luck". Sorry. Some of them have 9 kids and are fuckin' deadbeats even though they have all the TALENT in the world. And they actually deserve LESS of a break then (ahem) those with talent who are still at it and haven't fathered a FOOTBALL team. The amount of doors now open to that dude are 100x more than I've gotten in a lifetime. Now, he's gonna lose them ALL because he's an idiot, but it is slightly frustrating to those of us who just want the opportunities. Then again, nothing beats the head-shaking amazement of that video when he pulls up and that voice comes out of that dude. Fucking, wow.
9) Homeless in the 21st Century
I've already gotten over seeing a homeless person with a cell phone in LA, but this one really blew me away:
No, this wasn't the start of some line to get an iPad, this was two homeless peeps outside of a grocery store. And yes, the one homeless peep had a laptop. A guy I knew back in my WTVN days is also now homeless (legitimately, not like staying with a friend... actually sleeps on the street) but has a Facebook account and access it from libraries. However, having a laptop just really baffled me. I don't even have a working laptop right now. Ya know? LOL. I can't afford one. However, I guess if I didn't have to pay two mortgages I could. Hmmm.
10) Did she really just say that?
Wow. Can you believe I caught this? "I'll tell your plastic surgeon" is the best response ever. That was the venerable Bob Eubanks responding to Stephanie Edwards who has apparently been losing it for years now. Been holding onto this video for awhile, glad to do a Randoms so I could share it with you guys.
11) Oh, and Halle Berry
I apologized for not being a very good "Journey Documenter" when I went to a Q&A with Ryan Gosling a couple weeks ago. Went to another with Halle Berry and at least got this blurry pic:
Truth be told, I personally hate this shit and would never even document it if not for this site. Or get a picture with them? Why? To put it on Facebook so people think I'm friends with a celebrity? <SNORE> It just comes off as insincere to me. I already know I'm looked at differently because I live in this surreal city, throwing up pictures with me and celebrities as if we're "pals" is just gag-worthy. But I did feel responsible to those that read all this fucking sad drivel for years to at least show a random pic of Halle Berry... seemingly about to get gang tackled by three white guys. Ha. Listen, if this was Paul McCartney? Yeah, I'd be a little bitch. Otherwise, after Michael Jordan? You're not gonna see me starstruck. C'est La vie. Oh and this was a screening for "Frankie and Alice" where Halle Berry plays a woman with multiple personalities. It was good. Wasn't great (for a myriad of reasons), but she held her own. Unfortunately for her however, there are actors that are such remarkable "Chameleons" on-film that they blow these roles out of the water. She's too pretty to feel that shift. You want to see a skin-crawling personality shift? Ed Norton, Primal Fear. Fucking, wow.
12) It's a political shooting. Deal with it.
I'll be the first to say that of the Top 5 reasons Loughner did it, that 4 of them are "CRAZY"... but that 5th one? Yeah, it's political. She's a congresswoman, duh. And she's a democrat - 2nd duh. And if you just happened to put out a graphic with a gun-sight over the congresswoman's district with her name on it, and she gets shot point-blank in the face? You need to raise your hand and apologize for being irresponisble. There is no grey area here. This isn't the media being mean to Sarah Palin, this isn't the media trying to make it more than it is - it's the truth. It was a political assassination attempt that took the life of 6 people and dude was a radical anti-government crazy. I've watched the videos, and yes - some of his rants were anti-war which you could certainly construe as a "liberal" view, but dude was anti-government, period. Guess where that rhetoric is coming from? There's a big difference between saying someone is RESPONSIBLE for him doing it, and saying someone is IRRESPONSIBLE for using violent rhetoric. Man-up and accept that. I will even DEFEND Sarah Palin's use of gun-rhetoric and targets on a LOCAL level because in Alaska, that shit flies. In the entire northwest of this country it flies. For some reason she didn't get the memo when she came into the national spotlight that you have to shift a bit. She didn't, and this incident will drown her politically. Ya just don't do it. The right is absolutely feeding the fire. Obama is going to be shot at... and yes, that person will be "crazy", but they will also be fueled by this hate. Constant HATE. I've written about this a bunch and as I said in my video, it's like we're watching history in slow motion, but in the present tense. The right has to lay-off the hate a bit. Seriously. And again, what are they mad about? Are they mad that kids are dying in unnecessary wars for profit? No. They're angry about their tax dollars going to HEALTH CARE. What, the, fuck. We are the goddamn laughing stock of the industrialized world.
But for a couple of hours today, I'm now going to focus on a "game" that really doesn't matter. It just means that there will be a really cool 15 minute short-film in a couple weeks starring me and Marty if Chicago and Pittsburgh win today. That's exactly what we should be cheering for. Goofy games played by grown men.