I know, I know - when it rains it
pours. But I'm just not into romanticizing the little
things right now. I'm so sick of this fucking story I
am on complete auto-pilot. I taped this because
something instinctually said it was what I'm supposed
to do next.
CeBe ate my phone. I guess it was
on the kitchen counter (where it usually is) and for
whatever reason, though she's never done this before,
she felt like eating it. The scariest part?
I didn't even budge. I'm a walking fucking
zombie. Wasn't angry, wasn't even moved to do anything
but grab the camera and tape it. I have zero capacity
for emotion right now. If she had died in her sleep I
would've walked past her to get my shovel and start
digging... because that's simply the next
step.
What on earth could the 3rd
fucking day of this month hold? I have a job interview
for a position I'm not going to take. Hoping to do
something other than what the opening is for simply
because the position they need would mean attaching my
name online to their company in a really big way…
and I just can't do that. Even in the state I'm in
now, I realize I can't muddy my "brand". Hopefully
they'll be something more "under-the-radar" available.
I know I have to stop the
negativity, but no matter what "the secret" tells you
- some things are out of your control. All I can do is
just keep on reporting the facts. What I'm doing, and
what's being done back. Done worrying about the
storytelling. Fuck it.
